danae

I am sending out Ayn’s Place pictures and He told me I should do a quick blogger entry also while I am online….as this will I am sure be the last time before Sunday.

I leave Saturday morning back to Ohio. I am getting very sad and actually at this point just trying to ignore all the feelings going through me….as I will get overwhelmed. It has been a hard week for both of us with this…being the last week of the month…and knowing the time for me to go back to Ohio is coming upon us.

He has taken tomorrow off – to spend the last day with me. We are going over to Denver to spend the night so that we are near the airport on Saturday morning.

Today I packed…and colored my hair. He picked out a new color for me. It is a brighter red – auburn. It is a temp color, but something He wants permanently now so….I will be changing it.

I suppose I should be writing about other things….feelings, thoughts, fears, and joys….

He is great. We seem to mesh together really well. I have someone who loves D/s like I do…who has that passion for the lifestyle. We are still learning each other but we’re both very confident that we are good for each other.

There are fears and insecurities I have…I do the what if’s everyday for varying amounts of time…but….when I look at the big picture…when I reach out and touch Him…when I think of our time….together….I feel the rightness in it. I feel that He is the One. He is considerate but sadistic too. He cares about what I feel and think but He ultimately does what He wants even when I am a bad girl and “pitch a fit.”

I am scared very scared….I had a panic attack last night. It was hard for both of us. But He is important to me…and I am important to Him and making this work is what both of us desire. So we are going to work hard towards it.

We have been continuing our journey in S&M, D/s – Control, Bondage and so on….

Since the last time I have written….once to several times…I have been caged, dressed slutty for Him, been hooded, been blindfolded, been in the posture collar, been restrained spread eagle to the bed in the bondage mittens…I have been His slut moaning and begging for orgasms, I have been His nothing sitting at His feet not able to do anything but what He tells me, been His pet barking, whining and crying and so much more….

Of course I have been hobbled everyday and wrists cuffs have been on almost everyday now too.

It seems kind of surreal to read those things back and realize it is my life…that is me going through those things…I am a slut, a pet, a nothing….a slave.

My dreams are here…Dreams do come true.