30 Days of Kink - Day 25

Day 25: How open are you about your kinks?

To those outside the lifestyle - not open at all.  To those within the lifestyle - depends on how close we feel to them.  Recently Master and I have had the pleasure of really getting to know a group of people in our community. We feel comfortable with them so we can be ourselves with them and enjoy things we don't usually allow people to see. It really just depends on the person, how open we are with them.  

When I lived in Ohio, everyone I pretty much met - I came out too.  But with Master having his own business in a smaller town - it really isn't possible.  We still have that fear of being outted.  We aren't ashamed of being in the lifestyle, but we also are realistic in knowing people around us might not approve of our lifestyle and that could ruin Master's business and our lives.  

30 Days of Kink - Day 24

Day 24: What qualities do you look for in a partner?

I am sure I am missing some, but I think these are the biggies. 

Compatibility - in BDSM and kinky things as well as vanilla and everyday qualities such as did we enjoy some of the same hobbies, political beliefs, long term goals, views on religion and so on.  

Self-awareness - someone being self-aware is a good quality to me as it just seems to go smoother in a relationship because a person who is self-aware knows what they want and who they are and are steady and not so drama filled or chaotic with feelings/thoughts.

Chemistry- just everyday chemistry as well as sexual too.  Such as being able to laugh at the same thing, get each others jokes. 

 Honesty -  Being in relationships that haven't been honest,  it was one of the things that was really important to me.  

Sense of Humor -  I like a man that can make me laugh. Master has a great sense of humor. We laugh a lot in our relationship so thankful for that.  

Communication - having open communication and just knowing how to communicate is important to me.  I know some people can get very passive/aggressive in their communication styles and that just doesn't really work well for me so I wanted someone that wanted clear open discussion and communication and thankful Master places communication high on his list of qualities he sought too.

 M/s - O/p beliefs - since this is the kind of dynamic I sought out - I wanted to have someone who had similar beliefs as O/p is the foundation for our relationship
 

The previous 30 Days of Kink entries.

30 Days of Kink - Day 23

Day 23: Since you first developed an interest in kink, have your interests/perspectives changed?  How so?

Yes, of course.  When I was first exploring, I had quite a few things I thought I would never ever do or enjoy - such as golden showers. Never thought I would like them and never thought they would feel as they did - so thankful I took that leap of faith and submitted to doing it.  I never thought I would be into hoods and now I love them! Damn they turn me on. Really slipping a hood on pretty much sends me into a floaty space instantly. Thankful Master introduced me to them and that I enjoy them so much as they are one of his favorite kinks.

I think that early on in the exploring BDSM - I bought into a lot of the bdsm slogans and topics that came up.  Such as I was a firm believer in safe words early on, but now believe often good old fashioned communication is better.   I have been in situations where safewords and safe calls didn't protect me from someone that wanted to cross my boundaries. 

I have actually a couple essays out there that I don't totally agree with such as who is about.  I wrote that once long ago because it annoyed me that a dominant I knew often said it at times that really didn't call for it.  My end all in my relationship  though - it is about Master always. My first and last thoughts are always of Master and what he wants and desires. So that phrase works for this, but as I know I kind of go into in the essay - if it is only about one person always - that relationship won't last. Because if I wasn't happy and/or wasn't getting needs met, I wouldn't be here.  So it does need to be about both people. But I get that phrase different because of Master. 

Collars is another essay I wrote that I don't actually believe in many things in it. Like I don't believe in a collar of protection or a collar of consideration.  I feel sometimes again we complicate things and use those kind of titles or use it to hide behind it.  I think collar of protection often takes personal responsibility away from the submissive and that I don't like or get that.  I think sometimes we need to stand up and be responsible before we can surrender fully.    

In both of those essays, I notice I use the word power exchange in them. I don't even believe in those words anymore as I don't feel with Master I am exchanging power. I am surrendering to this will.  I don't have the power in this relationship, so how can I exchange power.

I know there are probably dozens of topics that my views have changed about over the years.  We are  human - we grow, change and evolve.  I am glad to see some things have changed over the years. It would be a fairly boring life I live if I didn't have things that changed.
 

The previous 30 Days of Kink entries.

30 Days of Kink - Day 22

Day 22: What do you think is important in keeping a BDSM relationship healthy?  How does it differ from a vanilla relationship?

Really I don't think there is much difference between BDSM relationships and vanilla in keeping a healthy relationship. Each takes compatibility, communication and just working to keep it going. All those things apply to BDSM as well as vanilla. Master and I have compatibility in our O/p and M/s beliefs and have that as our foundation. As well as being compatible in countless other areas - non-bdsm things as well as bdsm. Vanilla relationship would have different things they are compatible, but as humans we are all different so we each have different areas that we are compatible.  

I do think often we put too much emphasis on how we are different from vanilla relationships when I think basics in relationships are just a part of all relationships.

The previous 30 Days of Kink entries.

30 Days of Kink - Day 21

Day 21: Favorite BDSM related book (fiction or non-fiction)

Marketplace series by Laura Antoniou - this is hands down my favorite BDSM fiction.  My favorite in the series is The Reunion.  

This is a quote from it - it is in regards to Robin discussing her life in service to Chris Parker on the plane to Ireland....

"It was everything you said, everything you wrote, about the balance between owner and owned, the sense of knowing your place in the world and the strength that comes from that. Oh, I guess there were some days when I hated the workload, or I was just exhausted - but I never hated my life."

I looked at my books tag on my blog because I know I have talked about books enough here that I would have some info about BDSM fiction and non-fiction I have read. 

Here is a BDSM Book Meme that has books I read in bold, books I loved underlined.

I contributed an essay to a Power Exchange book.

Book reviews of The Academy and The Reunion by Laura Antoniou. 

Quotes from The Academy.

My Laura Antoniou fan-girl story.

Some small book reviews on some BDSM books.

Just to add some of my favorite (non-bdsm) books have helped me in service too...such as Home Comforts by Cheryl Mendelson or Memoirs of a Geisha by Arthur Golden. 

The previous 30 Days of Kink entries.

30 Days - Day 20

Day 20:  Talk about something within kink/bdsm that you’re curious about/don’t understand.

I am sure there are ton of things I don't understand in the lifestyle.  I have been involved with BDSM since I was 16 really and I am now 45 years old.  I have lived 24/7  -  Ten years with Master and three years with Kam.  So I have been doing this a long time, but it doesn't make me know everything. 

There are things I would like to try and do that I haven't, but I do have information on them. I have tried some things that haven't been successful,  but still desire - such as fisting. I have had a couple people try to fist me and it just hasn't worked. 

Another kinky thing I am curious about, but have done and would like to do again is gangbangs. But I know that won't happen as Master has no interest in it. I have already been involved with one, but not since I was very young and it is something I fantasize about still today.   

Most of the things I enjoy - I want over and over though are things I have done.  Some things sound interesting, but really don't spark that thing inside me that makes me crave it and makes me think about it over and over - obsessing.  But fisting and gang bang although I have tried, I am still curious about them and desire them.  

I have tried lots of things over the years and enjoy kink, but I am sure there will always be areas that peek my interest and others that make me go - no thanks. There are always things I am learning and I love growing through that learning.  

The previous 30 Days of Kink entries.

30 Days - Day 19

Day 19: Any unexpected ways kink has improved your life?  If so, what are they?

I am not sure there were unexpected ways. I think mostly I knew from the process that this was right and felt like the right path for me.  Made me feel more like myself. 

One unexpected thing that was a positive is gaining so many amazing like minded friends. I went in seeking an owner, but have met and made many friends that have touched my life in countless ways.  I think of my friends in Ohio who kept me going forward during such a dark time in my life. 

Feel extremely blessed for the friends I have made over the years. 

The previous 30 Days of Kink entries.

30 Days - Day 18

Day 18: Any kinky/BDSM pet peeves?  If so, what are they?

Master could tell you that I have pet peeves as he is the one that gets to hear about them, but really over the years I have just let a lot of them go. They aren't worth my time. But the thing that still gets me is the people that write me and aren't using common sense....such as asking me if it is okay to cheat on their husband because they want to explore kink instead of talking to him about it.  Or that have such unrealistic views of M/s.....such as they think I am beaten all day, kept naked and such.  I do get many emails that are genuine and sincere in wanting to know more too.  

Here are some things that have annoyed me over the years though....and for the most part still annoy me, but I move on from them really quickly. 

• submission is a gift
• slave heart - because often it seems people who believe this come across that they are better than everyone else
• slashy writing such as W/we 
• writing in third person when responding to public threads and forums - your own blog so be it, but in a forum it just seems like it would be common courtesy not to make it hard on people reading it. 
• the thinking that just because we are into BDSM we are better than anyone - else - such as you will hear "my relationship is so much deeper than a vanilla relationship." Vanilla relationships can be just as deep...it is the people involved and what they put into the relationship that makes it deep not just being into BDSM.
• those that assume everyone into BDSM is into poly
• those that think just because we are poly that means Master will be happy to fuck or play with them.  
• the safety police
• those think their kink better - or how they do this thing we do is better or that everyone else is doing it wrong

I am sure there are others - those are just the main ones off the top of my head. 

The previous 30 Days of Kink entries.

30 Days of Kink - Day 17

Day 17: What misconception about kinky people would you most like to clear up?

You know there are so many misconceptions about kinky people, that I couldn't even list them all if I wanted too, but I will list some.....

* M/s is insane or being a slave is insane
* Being a slave means being a doormat
* If you are slave, you are abused
* slaves don't have needs
* Dominants don't care about slaves needs
* M/s equals being naked all the time and being beaten daily
* BDSM is dangerous
* everyone in BDSM is poly
* all submissves and slave bend and bow to every dominant
* kinky people don't have interests outside kink
*  submissives have low-self esteem and low-self worth
* submissive equals slut

But the bottom line is that really it isn't up to me to clear those up - it is up to me to live my life how I want and others to do the same.

The previous 30 Days of Kink entries.

30 Days - Day 16

Day 16: What are the most difficult aspects of having a sexuality that involves kink or BDSM for you personally?

I am not sure I am getting the meaning of this question...maybe I am taking it mean something more then it does.  Because I really don't find anything difficult about being kinky or into BDSM.  

From M/s point of view, I guess the difficulties lie in the judgement against those who choose to do O/p or M/s.  Or the times when my brain goes into a flip-flop and I get panicked and don't think I can do this....I hate when I have those moments of - "wow I just wish I could just not do a,b, and c today because I don't want too."  I have been his 10 years and still I go through those moments.   It is just like some days you don't want to go to work, or go to see family on holidays.....you might enjoy your job and be passionate about it, but still doesn't mean you don't have off days.  You love your family, but still doesn't mean sometimes you just want to stay at home.  Slavery is sometimes like that for me - I am passionate about serving and being Owned by Master, but some mornings I wake up and go you know what I would love to not have to do a, b and c today. 

The previous 30 Days of Kink entries.

30 Days - Day 15

Day 15: Post a BDSM/kink activity you’re curious about and would like to try.

Well I have had this tried on me, but would like to try again - fisting.  I hasn't been successful by 2 people who have tried it on me.  It is one activity that I am curious about feeling it. I have done it on someone and it was so intense just doing it on someone, but I have never felt it done to me.

Not sure I can think of anything else at the moment that I am curious about. There are many activities that I have done and would like to do again, but really not sure there is anything new at the moment that I am curious about and would like to try. I enjoy the activities we do currently they are some of my favorite things....slapping, breath play, being held down and hurt. All yummy things for me. 


The previous 30 Days of Kink entries.

30 Days - Day 14

Day 14: How would you say real life BDSM/kink varies from fantasy BDSM/kink?  If you haven’t experienced real life BDSM/kink how do you think it might differ?

Well first I want to say IT DOES differ. I know it is nice to think that being online or being long distance is the same as serving face to face. But being owned and serving online or from far away is so different then serving day to day. It is more intense and gratifying as well as more mundane - and all can happen at the same time. 

When I served Master from Ohio, our emotions ran higher because all we had was that to focus on. I think that is often why people say that serving online is more or the same, but really if you are just having a heightened aspect that isn't the same as feeling a range of emotions face to face with all the the other elements factored into it. 

Words is just one thing that is different to me.  When I are standing in front of Master how I say something will be different then when I was states away sitting behind a computer screen or on a phone.  My wording actually became better when I was face to face, because if I didn't state something right while standing facing Master - well a slap across the face wasn't uncommon early in our relationship.  When I was online, well I could say anything really - although I didn't - but he couldn't slap me on the face. Yes, he could say good-bye or walk away, but the looking him in the eye and saying anything is just completely different feeling.  

Just having the intimacy of being near each other is so different.  Intimacy in not just sexual, but those casual looks as we walk through a store or the touch at the back of my neck. It all impacts those emotions and impacts our interaction all day long. 

 The previous 30 Days of Kink entries.

30 Days - Day 13

Day 13: Explain as best you can what the appeal of kink/BDSM is to you?  Why are you drawn to what you’re drawn to?

The appeal of kink/BDSM is that it is just a part of me. I can look back in all my intimate relationships that I really enjoyed and felt good in - and they all had some kind of power dynamic going on or kinky aspects to them.  I am drawn to a certain kind of man that naturally seems to be draw out my submissive/service side. 

I enjoy service based relationships because I like pleasing - I am not a people pleaser now as much as I was when I was younger.   But I still enjoy pleasing Master and knowing I am enhancing his life by serving him.  He doesn't have to worry about clothes being wash or ironed, he doesn't have to worry about cleaning his toilet, he doesn't have to worry about many daily things so he can focus on other things that matter to him such as his business. 

I am not sure why I am drawn too it - I kind of stopped trying to figure it out a long time ago. I just am and it fulfills me so that is all that matters.  

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30 Days of Kink - Day 12

Day 12: Tell us about a humorous BDSM/kink experience you’ve had.  If you haven’t had one, talk about aspects of kink/BDSM you find funny.

I am not sure I really had humorous BDSM/kink experiences, but I have humorous sex experiences....

* In my sexual history I have....

fallen off the bed during sex....

broke the bed during sex...

broke the futon during sex...

broke a table I was bent over...

broke a chair we were having sex in....


* My ex-husband and I were having sex before we married. We lived in a big apartment complex...the window was open. I forgot and after I ended my long screaming orgasm....we heard clapping. He peeked out the window the building was an L shape and several neighbors on their balconies were clapping and cheering. I went out and took a bow (with a robe on). He was totally embarrassed, but I was like so what...we know they all have sex and so do we….it is normal…so it was not a big deal to me but was a big deal to him.


* In another relationship we were poly - our household had 2 males and 4 females at one point. Anyway, one male and I were doing SM play and having sex...it was a long session that ended with sex. Anyway, during it our air conditioner went out. One of the females called maintenance - and did not tell us. They came in and took a look, but said they would come back later. She told us later that he for sure heard me moaning because she could. So he comes back later when we were up - and out - the maintenance guys said "nice to SEE you." -- And had this silly grin on his face...like he was saying nice to SEE you instead of just HEAR you! I wanted to die and hide, but I just kind of nodded and walked away.


* In the same relationship, we had a big plastic tub in the Master bedroom...it had all our SM toys...rope, floggers, sex toys (vibes, butt plugs), nipple clamps, clothes pins, gags, collars, leashes, chain and... tons of other toys. We had someone over and played the night before. I had not gotten a chance to get in there and clean up yet. So there was chains and cuffs attached to the bed, a butt plug and vibrator (that had been cleaned sitting on the night stand), rope in a pile next to the bed, a gag and blindfold hanging off the headboard, locks and more chain lying in a pile next to the bed, floggers and clamps hanging out of the plastic tub. 

The man I was involved with - was hooked up to a breathing machine at night for sleep apnea - but they needed to test blood oxygen levels to see if they had it set up right so needed to bring in another machine. Well he forgot to tell me they were coming by that morning. So when the guy knocked at the door I was a little surprised. He said he needed to go into the bedroom to hook it up. I said, “umm well I need to go clean up” and told him I would be right back. He said, “oh no don't bother I have seen I am sure much worse”...and followed me into the bedroom. I saw him look around and then he cleared his throat and said – “so isn't all this rain terrible?” and proceeded to carry on a "normal" conversation. We talked about restaurants and food. 

After he got it hooked up -- I had to fill out some forms -- so we did that in the living room. He said to me “you seem really cool.” I was still I think in a constant state of red from blushing from him being around all our toys. I said, “thanks.” He said, “you are very open minded.” I nodded and said, “umm yes.” And that is all the further he took it, but I could see he wanted to ask more. He just didn't know how to open it up to talk more.  And I just left it alone.


* Another time, same relationship, I was having a migraine and so laying under a bunch of blankets on the bed with head covered. I did not hear anyone knocking at the door. Well maintenance would knock, but if there was no answer they just let themselves in. Well they did -- they did not "notice" someone on the bed. Oh by the way I was naked - so I just lay there really still when I realized they had come in. They were changing out filters in the furnace (which was in the room where I was lying down) and changing out fire alarm batteries. So, I lay there just so still. On my computer that was in the same room - I had a screen saver with all sorts of bondage and SM porn -It was one of those slideshow type deals going through all the porn. So the guy gets done changing filter, turns around and sees it. He said, “wow.” Then he called to the other guy who was changing out batteries in the fire alarms down the hall into the room with him to see the screen saver. They stood their watching it and commenting on all the women and what was being done. Then they noticed the nipple clamps on the desk, the butt plug, vibe, and rope in a basket on shelving unit next to the desk....and commented on that. They were talking about how the people living here must really be kinky. Then they wondered if any of the photos were of the people living in this apartment. Commenting on how the carpet kind of looked like carpet in the apartment. Then all of sudden -- I heard a whisper. See I think one of them realized I was in the bed…so they left quickly.

So those are some my humorous sex moments besides just the laughing Master and I sometimes get because we are so damn happy during or after sex/bdsm play. 

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30 Days of Kink - Day 11

Day 11: What are your views on the ethics of kink?

My personal views are if those in the relationship are all consenting then that is all that matters.  An ex always had problems hurting me because he just felt it wasn't right, now that was his issue or line, but for me I kept saying if both consent to it then what is wrong with it. I liked it and he did too, but the views he grew up with that it is wrong to hit a woman and that there is something wrong with being kinky - those thoughts always interfered.

I am not a big fan SSC because who decides what is safe, sane or consensual. I like RACK, but again for me all the little slogans and mottos seems like we are trying to convince someone what we do is okay. If I am okay with it then, I really don't feel I need to justify that to anyone else.

But....here are some things I have said in previous posts and essays that kind of go with this topic...

BDSM Black List - this is a post I did not too long ago about the suggestion of a BDSM Black List which I am AGAINST - click on the link to read more of my thoughts on it. I think there are bad people out there we just need to be responsible for ourselves and use our head when going into all situations even  those that are fun and kinky.

BDSM for Beginners  - listing this because I think it gives some things to help those new to BDSM find your own lines before jumping into things and then realizing that you had lines you didn't realize

Slut - I am including this because some people do think that I am slut - had sex with too many people, too kinky, think my kinks are too weird, or whatever, but what matters is how I feel about what I do and how I live so falls under ethics to me because the only people you need to worry about is yourself and the people in your relationship. If you all enjoy it then that is all that matters.

RACK vs SSC - essay I wrote a long time ago just telling the difference between the two.


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30 Days of Kink - Day 10

Day 10: What are your hard limits?

In my past before Master, I had play partners and did some BDSM with clients when I was escort. When I had play partners, I had the some of the usual hard limits for people - kids, permanent harm such as dismembering, vomit,  murder (theft and other illegal activities), and blood letting.   

As an escort I had many hard limits. It just depended on the client. There was several that I did SM with and they always respected my boundaries so I moved some of the soft limits to things we could explore together.  Such as I didn't allow marking - bruising when I was escort because when a client bruised me it bothered other clients.  But with a couple of my clients, they really wanted to see what it felt like to bruise me, hit me hard enough to mark me, so I allowed it with just 2 clients.  Watersports were something else some of them wanted to do so with those 2 clients, I would do that with because they respected my boundaries and were honestly a lot of fun to be with so I liked exploring with them. 

With Master, his limits are mine.  He doesn't do vomit, kids, doesn't do scat, doesn't share me and doesn't do anything really that go against his morals. I am sure there are some other things I am not thinking about at the moment.


previous answered questions

30 Days of Kink - Day 9

Day 9: Post a kink related song or music video you enjoy.

I like Pretty When you Cry by VAST.  This is the first time I think I have ever watched the video though. 

I think this video is yummy....I have posted it before...it is Hurricane by 30 Seconds to Mars

I like the lyrics to Corrupt by Depeche Mode too... here is the video (just still images) and lyrics below....



I could corrupt you in a heartbeat
You think you're so special
Think you're so sweet

What are you trying
Don't even tempt me
Soon you'll be crying
And wishing you dreamt me

You'd be calling out my name
When you need someone to blame

I could corrupt you
It would be easy
Watching you suffer
Girl, it would please me

But I wouldn't touch you
With my little finger
I know it would crush you
My memory would linger

You'd be crying out in pain
Begging me to play my games

I could corrupt you
It would be ugly
They could sedate you
But what good would drugs be

But I wouldn't touch you
Put my hands on your hips
It would be too much to
Place my lips on your lips

You'd be calling out my name
Begging me to play my games


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30 Days of Kink - Day 8

Day 8: Post a kinky image you find erotic.

Well I am not going to post a photo, but I will link to some that I find erotic - that are over on my tumblr.  I can't just point to one either as too many choices! I find a wide range of photos erotic. I don't need every photo to include kinky things...I like the female body and so many shots I post aren't of bdsm but include elements that I enjoy. I can enjoy something without it turning me on too. It just is a nice feeling looking at them.  If I want to be turned on, I do need to look at BDSM photos.  It has to be bondage, breath play, photos that imply humiliation, force, captivity and pain turn me on.  So if you want to see the wide range of photos - go to my tumblr (if you click on the archive which is on the sidebar of the tumblr - it will give you thumbnail view of photos month by month.)  

So for here for this post.....just pulling out a few select ones.... no order probably not even many of my favorites just photos that turn me on...

Black and White Bondage photo - I just like the way the bondage look. I love rope bondage and every Friday on Tumblr I post just rope bondage photos. Recently I as introduced to a Bondage Photographer that I really am enjoying....http://lightworship.tumblr.com/

Piggie - She just looks so used with that pig snout on and cum in her hair.

Wax - His hand around her throat, whispering to her, tied up - no place to go while he hold her and drips wax on her - yums

Under water - I love this...well one it is an insex photo and they always turn me on.  Next she is tied up, under water, completely submerged with a tube for breathing, and a grate on top of her like a cage.  So many good things going on. Here are a couple others that are good under water photos - tied up struggling and held under and fucked and held down in bathtub struggling

Worship - I love the look on her face - I get that way sometimes about Master's cock too - where I am inhale and know how truly happy I am to able to be there and about to suck his cock.  Very happy place to be. Camille Crismson of The Art of Blowjob posts good blow job photos

Bodywriting - Master has wrote on me before and it turned me on a lot

Blackeye - I love the thought of having a black eye so looking at that lovely black eye makes me think of it being done to me. I love bruises and marks from Master, but having such an overt one really turns me on.  Another good black eye photo.

Choked - Breath play is one of my favorites so any photo that shows forms of it such as being chocked always get me going.

Over All - gag, bondage, insertable, rope around neck possibly strangling, suction on nipples - just pain and over all deliciousness

Encased - love the overall confinement of this - cut off.  Catsuit, belt straps to restrain, inflatable gag, hood, corset binding, posture collar - all of it makes it very hard to move. Would be very helpless and cut off from the outside world. It turns me on and scares the shit out of me at the same time.

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30 Days of Kink - Day 7

Day 7: What’s your favorite toy?

Well Master's hand is what I prefer to be beat with, but if we are going for actual toy - single tail probably is my favorite.  We really don't have the space in our house for using it though.  Master has used outside on me - out in the middle of no where.   It would be nice to plan one of those evenings again.    We both had a lot of fun.  Second runner up is the cat-o-nine.  It is nasty and I love the pain it inflicts. Gives me little masochistic shivers right now thinking about both the single tail and cat-o-nine. 

As said to start though I love it when Master uses his hand on me - slapping, hitting, grabbing, digging his fingers in, punching, spanking, squeezing, smothering, choking, twisting and pulling.  It is a wonderful feeling to feel the contact of his hand.   An intimacy/connection that can't be experienced with toys.  


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30 Days of Kink - Day 6

Day 6: Describe your weirdest/most interesting sexual fantasy.

Really I am not sure any of my fantasies are weird to me. I mean others might look at them and think weird, but I don't as they are my fantasies.  Now having sex with clowns while being beaten with a fly swatter might get someone off but that to me is weird. But again if that is what gets someone else off - more power to you. :) 

Most interesting fantasy...I am not sure....

All my fantasies kind of intertwine with each other and they are always dealing with humiliation/degradation.  Being treated like an object - an it or nothing/nobody for longer term.  Master will go those places when we are having sex but it usually it doesn't last more then an afternoon or a work day.  I would like it to be 24 hours or more.  He would too.  We have been building towards it as humiliation is something that we have taken very slow because for me with him humiliation has been different than it has been in previous relationships. It hits different spots in me.  Master likes hitting those spots, but he also feels I have some issues that might be harmed more by humiliation so we tread carefully with it. 


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