Dedication to Duties

"The dedication we commit to tasks both related and unrelated to our goals is a testament to our understanding that all we do has an impact on the course our lives take. Many people unconsciously divide their regular agendas into two disparate categories—duties that will help them realize their dreams and duties that must be attended to yet are insignificant. However, every objective, no matter how large or small, has something to teach us about ourselves and the world. When we willingly devote ourselves to the tasks laid out before us, our eyes are opened to the myriad possibilities lying dormant within them. The dedicated and hard-working attitude you exhibit regarding your duties today will help you see the significance of each item on your agenda." - Daily OM Horoscope

Perseverance

I am busy busy as usual!

I need to thank katie for the little package I got from her this week and then last week I got a wonderful package from kaylee recently too! (note to self: I need to post what it says on the princess pills later as it was so cute!) Thank you so much both of you! Also thank you kaylee for the help you gave on one of my projects! You ROCK -- it was just what I needed!

Since I haven't had a book to read for several nights now I have been reading Cosmopolitan. Master purchased something about 2 months ago and he got 4 subscriptions to magazines for very low price to free. Cosmo was free. I think Food & Wine was like $4 bucks and the highest one. So I got Cosmo because it was free. It has been years and years since I picked up a Cosmo. OMG was it always this bad? The gal & guy confessions, the articles if you can even call them that, the advice is just horrible. I know I shouldn't be shocked it is Cosmo but I really don't remember it being this bad. The confessions I felt had to be written by kids and sent in because do people really do the things they "confess." Thank goodness I received email notification of the next book in His Dark Materials series is on hold and waiting for me. I think we might be picking that up today.

I have been working on my parents Christmas present the last few nights. Last night though I was getting so frustrated with it though. So I hope today goes better with it and that I finish it. Another project I had been working will probably come to a finish today too so that is good. I will be able to move on to the next things on my ever growing list.

The tarot cards I have pulled recently:
Tues 11/20 - 5 of pentacles
Wed - 6 of pentacles
Thurs - the Magician
Fri - the Fool
Sat - Death
Sun - I forgot to pull a card that day -- forgot a few things on Sunday.
Mon - 7 of cups
Tues - 7 of pentacles

Lately some of my cards aren't making sense to me maybe I am just in a place to see what they are trying to say to me. Thursday was Thanksgiving and I got the Magician. I didn't feel like it fit very well. I mean I used my cooking skills and have that energy focused there but I unsure it really is that it was saying. Saturdays card didn't seem to fit either. I mean that card says to me major change to me and I really haven't had major change happening especially not on Saturday. Yesterday I was very focused on what I was doing. I didn't have much time to just get lost in myself or day dreaming. But yet the card was 7 of cups. I have been pulling quite a few 7's lately too. The week before last I think I had three 7's in a row. Now yesterday and today. Seems like a lot of 7's. Bah like I said I just am not seeing what they are saying to me. Maybe I just don't have right focus for them.

Todays card probably will fit today. As I can see the end near on several projects. And that feels good!

What else...

We are again giving each other a ton of movies for Christmas. Master ordered quite a few the other day at JR's. In the order was a Christmas pack of movies -- Scrooge, Miracle on 34th Street and then the other 2 movies were on it that I don't think I have heard of before but I am hoping he lets me have that pack before Christmas. I also got an Elizabeth Taylor pack and Cary Grant pack. And Roman Holiday too. (all those packs and Roman Holiday - $3.99 -- good deals at JR's if you haven't ever used them I suggest checking them out.) I like old movies. We don't have a lot of old movies in our collection but that will be changing now after this order.

Well I better get busy....

I thought there was something else I wanted to write about but of course at the moment I have sometime to write -- it has escaped my brain.

In the Stars...

Lets101 - Free Online Dating

The Zeppo

So the last few days I have been feeling down. Just feeling blah and sad. But really everything is going pretty good. Master has been busy with work. I have helped him out a little and then doing things around the house. We have been busy and productive and even had quite a bit of time for kinky fun things!

My bottom gives little twinges of pain when I sit down. I don't bruise or mark easy on my ass. And even with the playing this week there are no marks but obvious bruising under the skin because it hurts in places on my ass. You know telling a sadist where it hurts...of course makes him find many times throughout the day to poke and smack me on the tender bits.

Tonight is the Farmers Market so we will be picking up some fresh veggies..tomatoes and peppers I want the most. During the summer months main street is blocked off one night a week and then vendors set up tents and sell their goods. Most of it is fresh veggies and fruit. But there are things like chefs cooking with fresh produce. And then homemade good like soaps, metal or woodworking for sale. And there is always music...usually one or more bands or musicians set up for the evening.

Oh speaking of produce...we went to Sam's the other day. And we picked up a really big container of organic spring salad mix. It was much cheaper then buying the bagged ready to eat salad mix from the grocery store. And really I felt it was cheaper then buying all the things that would go into it making it from the different types of greens. The container is really large and packed really well. It doesn't have lots of air packed in it to make it look like a lot of greens. There is so much more in it then what we get with bagged. Plus this was so fresh, pretty, tastes great and it is organic! It is by Earthbound Farms.

Master installed a new shower head this past weekend. And it is going to make me look into remodeling our bathroom fairly quickly as the water sprays up on to the wall paper above the shower stall. I have always wanted to paint the bathroom and Master has been okay with that. It will be a lot of repair work though to the drywall and such so - I know I need to start researching on what exactly I will need to do to make it happen.

Daily Tarot Cards

Tuesday: Ace of Cups
Wednesday: Justice
Thursday: Death

What Tarot Card are You?

You are The Empress

Beauty, happiness, pleasure, success, luxury, dissipation.

The Empress is associated with Venus, the feminine planet, so it represents,
beauty, charm, pleasure, luxury, and delight. You may be good at home
decorating, art or anything to do with making things beautiful.

The Empress is a creator, be it creation of life, of romance, of art or business. While the Magician is the primal spark, the idea made real, and the High Priestess is the one who gives the idea a form, the Empress is the womb where it gestates and grows till it is ready to be born. This is why her symbol is Venus, goddess of beautiful things as well as love. Even so, the Empress is more Demeter, goddess of abundance, then sensual Venus. She is the giver of Earthly gifts, yet at the same time, she can, in anger withhold, as Demeter did when her daughter, Persephone, was kidnapped. In fury and grief, she kept the Earth barren till her child was returned to her.

What Tarot Card are You?
Take the Test to Find Out.

Daily Om Libra Horoscope

Just a snippet from A Solitary Release from September 21:

"Strong feelings of isolation can indicate that we have neglected our personal needs and should devote a portion of our time to reconnecting with our inner selves. The company of others is typically energizing yet can become exhausting when we are feeling socially detached and unsure of ourselves. Retreating into the tender embrace of willing solitude enables us to get reacquainted with our values and ambitions away from the distractions of a noisy world. Alone, it becomes easier to recall what is meaningful to us and to relax in the manner we find most refreshing. As you grow in solitude and once again feel comfortable being yourself today, the thought of spending time with others will become a joyful rather than traumatic one."

Daily Om Libra Horoscope

Just a snippet from todays Replacing Worry With Prosperity:

"When we no longer feel the need to worry about day-to-day survival matters, we are free to pursue opportunities that demand the whole of our attention while promising rich rewards. Anxiety drains our energy stores by monopolizing our focus and exhausting us physically. During bouts of worry, we are rendered unable to concentrate on activities that fall outside of the scope of mundane concerns. By banishing anxious thoughts from our minds and endeavoring to create an existence suffused by security, we empower ourselves to focus wholly on long-term goals and pleasurable pursuits. We draw prosperity into our lives by simply grounding our thoughts in visualizations of our ultimate futures. You are at liberty to explore your world today in part because you have built a sturdy foundation of stability in your life."

Daily OM Horoscope...

They are much more like....life lessons instead of horoscopes to me....

Reprinting whole thing...

The Love You Deserve
Libra Daily Horoscope

Self-directed criticism may cloud your opinion about your contributions today. You may feel anxious and insecure about your abilities, worth, or performance. Rather than goading yourself into working harder, try to accept that you are doing the best you can. Remind yourself that all you do has merit and is appreciated by others. If you finish a project, make a loved one happy, or learn something new, take pride in your accomplishments. Celebrate your small victories and remember that simply making the effort to achieve your goals, whatever the outcome, is worthy of a pat on the back. If you choose not to downplay your successes and acknowledge that you are a capable individual today, you’ll likely begin to see how much value you add to the world.

Accepting yourself can help you to recognize that doing your best is a reason to feel proud. Assessing your life in terms of your successes, rather than your mistakes, can remind you of how much you have accomplished. Accentuating your positive attributes and loving yourself for the person you are—while simultaneously accepting your imperfections—can open a world of possibilities that were previously closed to you because you now realize that you are worthy of what you want in life. You are no longer spending time berating yourself, so you have more time to pursue your dreams. When you accept yourself and find joy in your achievements today, you’ll regain your sense of self assurance and open yourself up to receive more good things.

Daily OM Horoscope

A little bit from my Daily OM Horoscope:

Being of service to others can make us feel empowered. When you participate in making someone’s life better, you honor that person as well as yourself. As you exert your personal power in ways that benefit others, you derive a strong sense of fulfillment because you see how you have the ability to change the world for the better. When you’re of service to others, you receive their gratitude, which raises your self-esteem and revitalizes you. By being of service to others today, you can come to understand that even your smallest contributions to the world’s well-being have merit.

Horoscope

from my daily om horoscope..."Remembering that you have the power to create your own reality can give you the ability to change your world to meet your needs. When you believe that the ultimate control over your fate and feelings rests in your hands, you can make your wishes come true. Your thoughts can determine what your present and future will be like, and you will be able to draw what you want into your life. You can find the ultimate happiness when you are willing to make the effort to create your own reality because your world will be tailor-made to your specifications. Positive energy and thoughts will bring forth positive results. When you create your own reality today rather than assuming others are in control, you'll be able to satisfy yourself no matter what."

The Beginning of my Journey....

I am sure I will have several posts coming but thought I would start at the beginning...so this is just the traveling info and a tarot reading.

I flew out Thursday and it was not a very good day! Master dropped me off at the airport about 7:30 (flight leaving (9am) and there was a long long line for checkin. By the time I checked in, did the security thing and made it to my gate -- they were boarding. I get on the plane -- get belted in and settled with my book -- when they announce that there is problems at O'Hare. There we electrical storms so bad they had to clear everyone off planes and equipment away too so we were going to be about an hour late landing at O'Hare. Well I had a connection that was only an hour and half between at O'Hare so that made me a little nervous -- as O'Hare is HUGE and I hate trying to find my gates there. When we finally made it to O'Hare, I asked the flight attendant what gate my next connection was going to be and she told me. Ugggh I was landing in Concourse C and had to go to F. She did tell me a quicker way with a shuttle to get there though. So, I get over there and quickly make my way to my gate to see that nothing is there. I go to Customer Service to see if they moved it but no they cancelled it completely. So here it is 1pm when my plane had landed and she does not think she will be able to get my on a plane at all today, but I will be on standby for the next flight at 4:40pm.

They can't get me on that flight. I do have to say though I sat next to the most interesting woman in the waiting area. She was from New Zealand and an Oral Historian. She talked about her travels and her homeland and it was a fascinating conversation. So she was the bright moment in my bad day.

Meanwhile that afternoon, I tried to ask some questions of one of the clerks attending that gate and he was so rude. I asked him where my luggage was from my flight from Denver to O'Hare and he said it will find me. No kidding - he rolled his eyes as he said it.

The other person at the counter was wonderful. I talked to her a few times and the first time she made arrangements for the first flight out in the morning. I saw her later beginning to hand out vouchers so I got in line and of course ended up having to speak to the idiot that told me my luggage would find me -- I asked if I could have a voucher for dinner and hotel as I saw others getting them and he said, "no." I said, "others are getting them." He said, "no they are not." I said, "yes they are" and pointed to a few people out in the waiting area I knew that got them he said, "no.". I said very calmly and politely, "I have been here all day and very patient and understanding that you cancelled my flight"...he interrupted me saying, "we canceled it due to weather so we don't owe you a voucher as we can't control the weather." Yep that is what he said to me. No I did not get his name as he had his name badge turned around.

So I am sitting there pissed and the line went down and the guy was gone so I figured I would go ask the woman for the vouchers. There was only one person in front of me -- and I got lucky she canceled her reservation for a flight at 8:40pm. So, the nice clerk put me on stand by for the other flights in between but if I couldn't get on those I would be booked for sure on the flight at 8:40pm. So, I sit there all day. I get dinner. I am tired. I read all my magazines and finished the book I had brought and am sitting people watching.

I am at the gate for my 8:40 flight (new clerks again) when I see that it disappears from the flight info board behind the clerk. It alarmed me so I go up and say, "is anything wrong with the flight at 8:40 -- did they change its gate or something" and she says, "No" giving me a look like I am being stupid. I said, "well it disappeared from the board behind you." So then she checks...the look on her face said it all! Horror...that was the look on her face. My flight had been cancelled and rescheduled for 11:04pm.

They asked us to stay close to the gate as it might change though. Well it did, we were scheduled to depart at 10:12pm but we boarded and circled the runway for almost an hour before we got in the air. In the air there was lightening all around us. Every window I looked out of I saw it. I have a big fear of Thunder and Lightening so I just sat there trying to meditate in my seat. Didn't work very well so it was dark and I cried silently letting some of my stress from the day wash away. (By the way no one was sitting next to me and they had the lights off so it was dark and no one saw me or heard me.)

I got to my final destination at 2am and girlie -- the trooper she was getting calls from me all day saying nope not on this flight -- was there to met me. We loaded things up and headed to the hotel where we proceed to have a wonderful girlie chat where we talked, ate cookies, laughed and giggled (because laughing and giggling are different) until 4:30am.

Friday we were awoken by the knock of maid service at our door. I just told them to skip us and we then planned out the rest of our day as we didn't have to be the retreat until that evening. We went shopping -- we went to build a bear where girlie bought me a bear. His name is Henry and just so cute! Thank you girlie! I just got done with a nap with Henry! We made one for someone else too....it was so cute! I had never been there it was fun!

Before leaving for SR that evening I had girlie do a tarot reading and then asked at the end to do it again...

1. starting point; theme of the question --- Eight of Pentacles
Meaning: must grow beyond self in order to find self. find a new way in seeing your tasks and needs.
2. oppossing or complimentary to to card 1 --- Six of Pentacles
Meaning: Realizing my needs. Make sure you are not just managing or making do. By giving of talents your needs will be met.
3. conscious side to problem/theme of question --- Ten of Wands
Meaning: Too much on my plate, bundle of energy that is trying to become totally focused on my desires and tasks.
4. root, basis, unconscious side --- Eight of Cups
Meaning: turning off feelings to the point of numbness or no feeling so that everything just passes you by good and bad
5. past --- Three of Cups
Meaning: needs not being met, losing individuality by not expressing needs
6. future --- Three of Wands
Meaning: With enthusiasm I will find the solutions to met my end goals. I need to move/act to make it happen.
7. internal attitude --- Star
Meaning: I don't feel I have the light within to face my problems. Allow the feelings I have to be explored...hopes and visions can be realized and fears need to be dealt with
8. outside, how others view me and the problem --- King of Pentacles
Meaning: others view I have everything...I am successful...that I have done hard work and now am successful
9. hopes and fears --- Page of Cups
Meaning: not clear of identity, having problems loving self, very sensitive
10. outcome --- Three of Pentacles
Meaning: new beliefs coming, letting light shine on the problem I am facing to show knew skills, freeing myself from the burdens that I have put upon myself

(by the way that is not an image from the exact tarot set used)

Horoscope for Free Will Astrology

Interesting...I think I should ponder this for a while and see what I am in the closet about...

For the week of May 26th...
Libra (September 23-October 22)
We're all in the closet in one way or another. Every one of us feels that there's some part of ourselves we've got to hide; that if we reveal the totality of who we really are, we will suffer. For example, U.S. Army Sgt. Robert Stout, who was wounded and got a Purple Heart for his service in Iraq, ultimately decided he was tired of being secret about his homosexuality. As a result, he can't re-enlist, even though he'd like to. My psychotherapist friend Alicia has always used astrology in her practice, but only recently chose to be open about it. Some of her colleagues broke off relations when she told them. According to my reading of the omens, Libra, it's an ideal time to carefully come out of whatever closet you've been in. I'm not saying there'll be no repercussions; just that you'll have clarity and strength as you deal with them. And the freedom you create with your brave revelation will change everything for the better.

Free Will Astrology Horoscope

ummm okay....

From Free Will Astrology for the week of May 12th...

Libra (September 23-October 22)
[Caution: Information in this horoscope contains references to exotic sexual practices. If you might be offended, stop reading now. I present this material because you are in a heightened state of arousal, both physically and metaphysically, and could benefit from outrageous provocations as you rethink your approach to intimate acts of love.] The ladybird beetle copulates for up to nine hours at a time, and males may have three 90-minute orgasms in one session. Bonobo apes are not obsessed with orgasm, but have frequent erotic exchanges of every variety, from intercourse to mutual masturbation to oral sex; homosexual contact is common. The male sponge louse disguises himself as a female to aid his seduction strategies. As soon as praying mantises begin coitus, the female bites off the male's head and eats it; sex continues, however. The slime mold comes in 500 genders, and at least 13 of these have to collaborate in order to have a successful mating session

Meme: 2 More Questions Answered

Do you identify with a certain tarot card?

I really don't identify with a card at the moment because I have not been doing it enough lately to have them speak to me. Which is a regret of mine as I really enjoy tarot even for meditation...focusing on the cards that are drawn and seeing where it takes me.

I have 4 decks. Three standard kind of Tarot sets (3 based on the Waite Tarot - but I basically just use the one and am looking for another set that I really can identify with). And then Osho Zen Tarot set....which does not go by the Wait Tarot system.) I love that deck a lot....has cards that deal with Mastery of Action, Mastery of Emotions, Mastery of Mind and Mastery of the Physical. It does have a major and minor arcana but again they are not like the Waite Tarot system.

Long before I met Master the 10 of Swords in Moni's Tarot Deck used to come up quite a bit. On her deck it is a face with all sorts of swords coming in through different places. It is actually a card I would like to do my own interpretation of in a drawing. The card artistically is a card I really enjoy. But when a person gets it in a reading well that is not a good thing. And I would get it ALL the time because my life was in such shambles.

But Swords go with all the air signs and I am one...being a Libra. So swords seem to always show up in my readings. Another card I used to get quite a lot and identified with is the justice card...again it is associated with libra's.

I know Moni associated me with the moon card but I bet that has changed. Well maybe. I know why she picked it when she picked it represent me on her website.

Okay so fast forward to when I started talking to Master - The Fool was the card that kept coming up. Now that card does not mean Master was a fool or I was a fool. The Fool actually is a good card to get in a reading. It is also the only card in my Osho Zen card that is similar in meaning to the standard tarot deck. So that card kept coming up over and over and over! And I even pulled it the day I met Master. So for a while I strongly identified with that card.

The Fool on my Osho Zen set means:
"The card indicates that if you trust your intuition right now, your feelings of 'rightness' of things, you cannot go wrong. Your actions may appear 'foolish' to others or even yourself, if you try to analyze them with a rational mind. But the 'zero' place occupied by the Fool is the numberless number where trust and innocence are the guides not skepticism and past experience"

But I have not had the Fool in a while.

So since getting the question - I have done a few just quick 3 card drawings and death has been coming up and also I get a tarot thing in my inbox that was death the topic of the one the other day. On my Osho Zen one I have gotten a variety of cards but I did get the one that has similar meaning to the Death card....it is the transformation card.

Death means changes are coming....death of one thing to bring a new thing. A transformation of sorts.

But then I also am still getting my absolute favorite card that I relate to in my Osho Zen deck...No-Thingness. I also received creativity a few times and today I got consciousness.

Okay so enough babbling on that....to answer the question again...no at this time I really don't identify with a certain card. But there have been cards in my past that I strongly identified with in tarot.

It says you are bisexual but I have never seen you talk about women are you involved with a woman currently when was the last time you were involved with a woman?

Yes, I am bisexual and if you have been reading this journal for only a short while - no there would not be any talk of it - as I am not involved with a woman currently. And not sure if I will be again as I am owned and that would be up to Master if I am able to have outside relationships. He, I believe, will want to be in the relationship too...so a triad or something of that nature. But He does not believe we are ready to pursue any outside relationships at this time, but is not ruling it out for the future.

I have talked about a few women in this blog that I have been involved with...Morgan and Honey being just 2 of 6 or 8 I have mentioned. Taking from another entry I did on being bisexual and also adding to it....

I have been with some incredible women. A lot just didn't work for various reasons...

One who I have written about did not work because I was owned (this was before Master) and she did not wish to be a part of our household. I was allowed to be with her a few times on my own but it was always full of guilt trips put on both of us. And full of lots of up and downs of emotions. So, then when I wasn't owned and could freely form a relationship with her...she was owned. So we were not allowed to get together again.

Another that I written about - well she was not truly bisexual. She loved me and loved me enough to want to make me happy. And so she was with me because she loved me. She has been with women but she is truly not attracted to them. It is usually for the man in her life that she is with other women.

I was with a couple of women who were rebounds usually rebounding to them after being in relationships with men and so just talked about them briefly.

I also was with another woman who was part of a couple. We were trying out the triad thing. But it was too soon for her at that time and so it did not work. We are still very good friends today.

Then just a couple others that were just sex (which is fun, but sometimes a girl wants more and actually usually with women I want more - men I can just have sex with and walk away but doing that with women is harder for me).

I have also been with a few women I did not want to be with because of being owned and in a poly household. I did it to please the dominant. And actually I was with two women that I did want to be with because of that same D/s relationship.

And last but not least was Morgan, was my first love...and she meshed with me in such a wonderful way it is hard to describe with words. She was tender. She knew when to take control. She was completely open and honest with me. She gave me so much of herself. It was so good...I love her...still.

Have you ever read lyrics and thought that the music must sound one way...and then you hear it and it is totally different but works...works perfectly? That is how it was with us...I think people probably did not understand how it worked. But then saw us together and went wow.

The only problem was that by that time I grew up the views of society were influencing me. And so I pushed because I could not accept that I was in a relationship with a woman.

I talk about some of the women mentioned on my who's who page.

I have not been in a relationship with a woman for a very long time...several years ago....almost 3 I believe. I had several offers that I had to turn down because of the place I was in at those times mentally and emotionally. And again I am not sure when/if I will be again as that will be up to Master.

life update

A Quiz...
Dog Toy or Martial Aid

Missed 1 the first round and 2 the second

Horoscope for Thursday....
LIBRA (Sep 23?Oct 22): There is hard work in doing what you do and living your life in your own special way, even if it looks easy to others. Now, more than other times, your discipline and your work ethic can set the stage for the really big payoff. Don't think about cashing in your chips yet. Just keep that production line moving.


TV...
Bravo has become my favorite station. The Long Way Round with Ewan McGregor and his friend Charlie....is quite interesting. It is beautiful to see all the countries they are seeing...the landscape, people and hospitality. They have had some hard times but obviously some tremendously memorable times too. And they are also very amusing. Some of the things that happen to them...and the things they say are extremely humorous.

I enjoy watching The West Wing, Long Way Round, Inside the Actors Studio, Queer Eye, and Celebrity Poker - all of which are on Bravo!

Nesting...
One of Master's co-workers said I am nesting. Yep it is that time of year. I go through it a few times a year and with the holidays approaching it is one of those times.

I have been reorganizing the house. I am all ready for Christmas to come...Christmas decorations already to be pulled out of the closet. I have been in a decorating mode. Rearranging furniture, redoing curtains and such.

Master's living room had Scarlet O'hara curtains....several patterns (one being a big floral), lots of swoops, draping over draping, fringe. I didn't like them. So it was something that I requested be replaced and Master said yes. We found some we liked and Master bought one pair to test out. Master and I both really like them. The color is called Green Tea. They are a really pretty shade of green. Not pastel but also not too dark to make the room look closed in. They blend really well the hunter green carpet too. Yesterday Master surprised me with the rest of the sets we will need to finish with the draperies in the living room.

I found an old curtain topper that the pattern is not bad but it has ruffles (I am not big on ruffles). I am going to cut off the ruffles and maybe add some big wooden buttons I have in my craft stuff to it and use it in the spare room.

I am still reorganizing. Master's dining room is lined with cupboards. And so with the spare room in order now, I moved some art supplies and books I had in those cupboards to the spare room. I had unpacked a few crystal pieces and some more teapots (I collect them and have way to many - even got rid of some before I moved) while reorganizing the spare room so those got put in the cupboards. The cupboards have glass fronts so it puts them on display.

This weekend I want to get things finished up and also bake.

Well I need to send out pictures and a few other things online before we get to bed.

"We are not human beings having a spiritual experience. We are spiritual beings having a human experience." -Pierre Teilhard de Chardin

Tarot Reading...

I did a simplified celtic cross tonight....

1. Ace of Cups – Your experience to date
2. The Devil – Where you are now
3. Seven of Cups – The Near Future
4. Ten of Wands – You in the environment of the Future
5. The Tower –Best you can hope for
6. The Fool - Outcome

Horoscopes

Masters:
SAGITTARIUS (Nov 22–Dec 21): There are issues stewing from the past few days, and you may feel as if you are passing through the eye of the storm. Perhaps you are, but it's difficult to know in which direction you'll turn once the turmoil settles. Stay focused on your career. It's still going to pay off, as long as you stay patient. If you do lose patience, however, the meltdown can be very powerful and therapeutic for you.

mine:
LIBRA (Sep 23–Oct 22): It's a day for emotional dialogues as you confront the widening gulf between your thoughts and feelings. These internal "conversations" don't need another person; they can be expressed internally, as you observe the conflict between two active inner voices. Of course, it can also be expressed outwardly in a relationship. Although you have an opportunity to open wide to another person, you should try to steer clear of situations that would require you to stay strictly in the logical and rational realms.

Music: French Kiss 2
Mood: good :)

Awareness

Just a quickie...

These fit way to well - scary is that all the ones from BeliefNet this week have been on it in regards to the drama.

Horoscope from BeliefNet.com: LIBRA (Sep 23-Oct 22): Disruptions to your daily routine may not be the worst thing for you at this time. Even if you are trying to maintain stability at home or in your relationship with your parents, tensions keep finding their way to the surface. This isn't a brand new issue, for the process may have started a week or so ago. Don't fight what is coming up. Awareness is necessary for the changes to happen later on.

Horoscope from Free Will Astrology: Creativity expert Roger von Oech takes issue with the old saw that a chain is no stronger than its weakest links. He thinks they're indispensable. "Many systems have weak links designed into them," he says. They're called 'fuses.' When a system gets overloaded, the fuse blows and saves the rest of the system." Judging from the astrological omens, Libra, I'm pretty sure you'll soon get to play the role of a fuse yourself. Whatever group or structure you're part of needs to break down for the sake of its long-term health--and you're the best candidate to lead the way.


I meditated last night after my post to my blog. And what came to me is I need to release the anger, hurt and disappointment so there will be a post to let it all out probably tomorrow. And then later after I post it I will do a cleansing ritual to release all the negativity that is left. I have only done it 2 times before so you see how much this is online drama is affecting me. ugghhh

I also want to thank everyone that has wrote me last night and today. I really appreciate the understanding and friendships.

mine for today...LIBRA (Sep 23–Oct 22): Friends can come to your rescue now, whether it’s just a social escape or a more meaningful chance to share what’s on your mind. If you’ve nothing on your social calendar, it could be time for you to get on the phone and make something happen. This could be a big day for you, but you’ll need to be willing to co-create it.

I found it amusing as I tried to call Honey a little while ago and then wrote j to see when is a good time to call her. Both those done before I read the horoscope.

Stopped writing because Honey called me back. We both were blah and so felt it was not an exciting phone call but it was good to talk to her.

I really need to read Mindfulness in Plain English because many of the Buddhist Wisdoms I get in my email that really strike a cord with me come from it.

Don't cling to anything and don't reject anything. Let come what comes, and accomodate yourself to that, whatever it is. If good mental images arise, that is fine. If bad mental images arise, that is fine, too. Look on all of it as equal, and make yourself comfortable with whatever happens. Don't fight with what you experience, just observe it all mindfully. -Bhante Henepola Gunaratana, "Mindfulness in Plain English"

For tomorrow:

His....SAGITTARIUS (Nov 22–Dec 21): Interactions with others can put you into a difficult situation, but it’s nothing that won’t be able to be overcome—as long as you are willing to communicate. Unfortunately, communication may still be a bit strained, but this isn’t reason enough to put off what needs to be said today.

mine...LIBRA (Sep 23–Oct 22): You might be unable to fully relax today as your nervous system is a bit jumpier than usual. You are stretched tightly in your mind and it may be difficult to unwind. But this is not as bad as it sounds, for you can find the harmony within the movement of the day.