danae

Busy Weekend....


Well this should be in interesting blogger lol….

Friday I had to do work and had a work meeting. It was interesting to say the least lol Saw M on friday night also, but not for very long and in kind of a formal setting so not able to just chat with him. Friday morning Mistress DM called and we had a discussion on why the ER episode might have bothered me and I think some of it…..of course….was right on her part. So I need to talk to Honey when I get there about the things that have been racing around inside me.

Then Saturday, Daddy and I ran around getting stuff for my trip. I still have some things to get tomorrow. We bought a new suitcase and a portable CD player for me and ugggh a swimsuit lol We then had lunch at Schlotzsky’s with a friend. Mmmmmm I love their sandwiches…I used to work there when I was in college so ages and ages ago.

Saturday night…..

I am not sure even where to begin or what to say…

It was really hard on me…..to know that was the last night I will have with Sir before leaving for 2 months. I was hoping it would be very special and it was but it was also interesting – not sure that is the word I mean. People like to try to disrupt lives. We though cannot control their actions only how *we * react to them.

It was interesting…..he got there before I did and waited in the parking lot. I got out of my car and my cell rang as I was walking to the room. It was him. He told me to turn around and look across the parking lots….and there he was it was very romantic to see him there. I am not sure I can explain why but it was. Then he explained that we needed to talk.

He had called me earlier and the phone call sounded off – he did not sound like himself and I got this ache inside like something bad was about to happen. I tried to shrug it off. And then he tells me we need to talk and I got that same feeling. He told me the topic – we were going to discuss and then I understood why I had that bad feeling.

I was so in my mind set – deeper then I had been in a long time. And as soon as he told me what had happened…I snapped out of it. I told him that I was out and he was like yes I know. He probably wanted to say DUH lol But then after we talked some he took me by the hair and kissed me and then told me what to do and he had that tone and look that sent me right into that place again. Not as deep as it was but it was a good start : )

But then we started to session and that is when I let the person that tried to create some havoc in my life into my head. Everything hurt when Sir did it – and not in that good way. I was trying to endure it and move from my negative place to the place that I love with him…and I just could not and of course he noticed. He stopped to talk to me. We talked a long time. In that talk because of the hurt…I was kind of sitting in that hurt….I tried to scare Sir away so that it would be easier to leave. But it did not work. It was really hard on both of us and I am going to miss him more then I can express.

We end up talking and talking and then started back into play. It was hard and on the edge of a place that he knows I want to go. I was in masochistic mode and I craved the pain and wanted him to keep going. He let a part of himself out that he doesn’t let out. I was glad he let it out and felt he could have let it out all the way.

I am not sure if I have bruises from last night but I should have because we played hard after I got things out of my head and he was the only thing there. Just how it should be.

He is incredible. I am very grateful for all the conversation we had that led to the night that I submitted to him.

During the summer I tried to submit to someone and it was a struggle to do it. It felt like each and every little step was a decision. A battle within myself. And with Sir it doesn’t feel that way. I turn around and go wow…look at all I have given and submitted too. He has not taken control really but yet he has in subtle ways that mean a lot but when others look they probably would not see that there was a Power Exchange going on. When we are alone the power exchange to me is very obvious. I feel the energy swirl around us.

Sunday – I got up, came home to pick Daddy up and then he and I met Mz Natasha and Di for brunch. We then came home and Honey called : ) I am very excited to be thinking I will be seeing her in about 48 hours. I was hoping to get online today to chat with Mistress DM but it did not happen : ( I talked to Sir a few times on the phone today. He had something going on that I felt was very important and wanted to be there for but I needed to spend time with Daddy. Then Daddy and I did business discussions tonight. Before I leave for Germany lots of things need to be in order. The final episode of Le Femme Nikita was on tonight so Daddy and I watched that. We then talked after that and even though I know he was not totally thrilled with the conversation I liked that we talked. It feels like we have not lots this week because I have been so busy. And then we had GREAT sex! : ) Daddy had been with me almost 3 years and just knows all the right places to touch and how to touch mmmmmmm On the 10th of March Daddy and I will have been together 3 years.

So now it is 2:30 am and I have laundry going, a book open in front of me trying to get my daily dose of growing and learning life, 3 lists in front of me jotting down things as my mind races around, writing my journal, and I have my webpublisher open trying to work on a website….nothing like multi tasking at 2:30 in the morning…lol

I just want to tell Daddy, Sir, Di and all my other friends here I am going to miss you…

But I will be back and we will not have lost anything…..only gained from our experiences.