Saturday, July 04, 2009

Lectured Not to Have Sex

Always Aroused Girl is having a contest that involves adding your story of how sex was taught in your family at Beyond the Birds and the Bees.

I grew up in a home that sexuality was often on the far ends of the scales. It was nothing for my Mom to walk around nude. And for my parents to very affectionate in front of us kids - kissing and groping in the kitchen wasn't uncommon. I of course giggled at it as a little girl. But growing up I now appreciate that they could be so open with their affection and sexual attraction in front of us.

But at the same time we were told that sex wasn't something we needed to know about until we were grown up. And they really didn't want to talk about it.

I am not sure when it happened but eventually I figured it out that my Mom and Dad had to get married because they got pregnant with me. And as soon as I became aware the lectures came to not do the same thing. I heard all about the things my Mom and Dad had to give up because they had sex. But still it wasn't talked about what sex was or how it worked. And it did create a message for me that sex was bad - forbidden because it made you give up things that sounded like they were better and good.

All the while though still my parents still were very open with their affection for each other so it made me want to have that but just not tell them. So I learned about sex on my own, from girly magazines my Dad had stuffed in the back of his closet and from friends.

***If you have been a reader of this blog for a while you know that I left out stuff. Because my first sexual acts were as a little girl - unfortunately. So I really learned about sex in a way that caused my views of sex to be all over the place from feeling bad and shame to feeling pleasure and the desire for more.

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