I cannot sleep tonight.
I have been really busy this week with work. My housework and all the everyday things like grocery shopping, cooking and such have been kind of off too. I hate when it is like this very unstructured and scattered. I also do not like strict structure but some how crave it at times. Go figure lol
I was just looking to see if I have written anything that I have not posted yet…..here it is…I wrote this Jan 6th.
Right now Jackie is on a plane going to Italy. Things have been very strange between Daddy, her and I since she left to go to be with her “family.” It has been very hard because it seems she compartmentalizes. We are part of her life, school is another part, and then her family is another part and none really intermix. While she was with her family before going to Italy she was very distant and we did not have much contact. It made me feel very out of touch with her and when we would talk to her she was very vague. It felt very much like we were held at arms length and almost not to be trusted. So I had a talk with her the last couple of days and she seemed to see what I was saying and how hard it was…on Daddy and I that when she did that.
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I heard from Jackie on day this week. She was in Rome for orientation still and then going to Florence. So she should be in Florence by now.
I am on like hmm 20 bdsm mailing lists on egroups. And I have not even been reading my mail lately. I really should be on no mail. Because it has been a struggle to even read any of it – to have the patience and concentration for it. I get frustrated lately reading the views of others. I find them to be so out there and I just wonder if they live life in a glass bubble, where nothing ever just happens that turns their lives upside down.
You can see I am scattered right now because I am going to go from one thing to the next lol
Yesterday was kind of fun even though very busy! I got things set up for one job I do…since this weekend was going to be busy with for it. And then Daddy and I met Di for lunch. : ) He then left and went to work. And Di and I went to run some errands. First time I had been in her new car….it is super cool…just like her. We stopped and saw E. I had not seen E in a while and so that nice. We had a good vent session about work. Then Di went and ran one of her errands and then she brought me home because I needed to get some more work done for this weekend. Daddy came home and we went out grocery shopping and then went and saw another friend of ours TBN. She is a cutie but boy she can talk lol Her mouth does not stop. I came home and straightened some of the house up and I went to bed actually really early. Which might explain why I am now up at 3:46am
I bought Daddy 2 new floggers for Christmas and ordered both off ebay. The one has still not come and when I questioned them about it they said they were behind on schedule with the holidays in getting things out. I really want to see the new one. I was hoping to have it here too before this week.
I was hoping Daddy would let me use it when I might go play with a friend of mine. : ) We might have some time in a Dungeon of a Pro Domme we know. So that would be cool.
Probably should let Daddy use it on me before I take it huh lol
I have so many articles started and not finished….I really actually have been in the mood to write too so I wish I could have some time to focus on them. I have the Submission is not a Gift on started, one on humiliation, another on fear, pain, darkside, and one other I cannot find right now. Oh and I wrote one on poly and have actually like 3 more started to go along with that. I might post the one on poly here.
Poly is something I wanted even before bdsm. I was a little girl and not sure where I got this idea from but I would draw these houses and it would have a Master bedroom where the Man would sleep and then I had rooms where the wives would sleep. Catch that plural? I did say wives. I always envisioned being in a kitchen and laughing and cooking and cleaning with other women. I always thought it was like they took turns being with him at night. Not sure where I got that as I was raised in a “normal” family – mom, dad, kids. We went to a Christian church so I did not get it from being Mormon or anything. I just wanted it to be that way I guess..lol
Okay I better get to bed. I have a feeling tomorrow is going to be a long day.
Good night….
