Well life has been positively wonderful lately…. Master had a couple days off and we took full advantage of it. We had hot SM and sex on Friday and Saturday. And even some on Sunday too. The Domestic Violence looks similar to M/s post sparked Sunday’s fun. Yum! Yum!
Isolation seems to be a topic that I has come up in a lot lately. It actually is a dark desire of mine to have more extreme and semi-permanent isolation. Moving here to be with Master has been a big change to my state of isolation. I was very social before I moved to be with Master. I did things with friends a lot and was active in the BDSM community. I lived in Ohio and he lived in Colorado. I have friends and family all over the country, but I have some very good friends in Ohio that I was sad about leaving. I was very close to some people and so it was hard. I miss them a lot, but I do keep in touch. My family though was all out of state so I was not leaving them directly.
I have people I knew and also friends that were upset with me moving and expressed concerns about me moving across the country to be with Master. For years, I have heard concerns about the relationship that I sought. And of course heard concerns before moving to be with Master.
But through it all I knew what I wanted and knew that when I had the life I was seeking I would be very fulfilled. There was always this little piece of zen-like calmness that knew the things I wanted in a M/s relationship was what I have always wanted for my life. And of course, I found that with Master. So even through all the warnings and comments that I was insane, unsafe and not acting with consensuality in mind, I had to do what was best for me. I had faith in myself. And following that has landed me in a wonderful relationship with my Master that has been like no other for me. I am blessed and grateful that he found me.
I do have to say I did not listen to the people that attacked my beliefs. I always appreciate my friends thoughts but did not let their thoughts influence my beliefs. I did not let their negativity doubt my faith in what was best for me. Even before Master and came to be together, I stayed strong in my faith of knowing what was best for me. And then of course after coming to be Master’s….I had strong faith in my relationship and my slavery to my Master.
Okay so back on to the topic at hand….isolation…
I am happy and fulfilled in my relationship with my Master and the isolation he has used on me in our relationship has not damaged me, has not created boredom and has not made me lose my personality.
I think there are fine lines with isolation equating abuse. I have been in abusive relationships before and one even used isolation as means of control. But M/s relationships can look like abuse does not mean it is abuse. The feelings in the relationship are what make it abusive or not.
I like to be isolated by Master as it helps me feel centered. It also helps me know my place as property when I am struggling with submission. I know Master does it so that I can feel those things. He enjoys the mindset I get from it. But he also does it because he likes the control of it. And well as most people know, Dominant’s generally like control.
Isolation can come in varying degrees. There have been times where I have not been allowed to talk to anyone but Master. But it was not done 24/7. It was done for a day or week.
There are times in my life that I am isolated that I think some would think – I am extremely cut off and isolated. But I don’t feel I am and would like to be more extreme at times. I am not sure how realistic that is for our lives though.
Some examples of my isolation…
- I don’t work outside Master’s home
- I don’t drive even though I have a drivers license (that is in Master’s wallet)
- I seek permission to make phone calls or chat online at times
- I don’t have any local friends that are mine. All my friends are his friends and they are not close like they were in Ohio as I can’t be “out” here like I was in Ohio
- I don’t leave the house without Master – to do grocery shopping, errands or anything – I am always with him when I leave the house.
- Then there is he SM type of isolation – being chained to the bed for more then a night. Being locked in a cage. Being hooded, restrained, gagged…
All those things can and do happen in our relationship and I am perfectly happy and healthy. And even after periods of isolation (be it an afternoon or a week or whatever) I can still carry on conversations, express my personality in those conversation just as I did before…I was owned. I did not lose my identity - in fact I am finally able to be me. I feel now everything is better. As I am more happy and fulfilled and that comes out now.
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