Life Update
Been sick - Sunday evening I went to bed not feeling well at all....Monday I was sick all day. Tuesday still kind of recovering. I owe several people emails and I am going to get to a few tonight as I feel Master is going to be up late and I would rather be up sitting here next to Him in the office then alone in bed. But if you don't hear from me tonight - know you will get one soon.
Gmail Invite Thingie
Anyone who want a gmail or wants to give their invites away....without all the work of pimping them...go here. It is place that disperses them. You can also go here and they give them to people in the military wanting them. I have used both services now and it a nice away to get rid of them.
Hot to Serve
Okay this is not going to make sense to many people probably...
Master has had so much going on for work. He has been working lots of hours...such as Going in at 9am coming home at 9pm and then working at home from 10pm to 2am or 3am. Getting up at 7am and working a few hours before He starts that all over again. This weekend I asked Him if there was anything I could do and He actually said yes. He usually does not have anything I can do that because it is technical stuff for His job. But this project was making graphs. And I could do that.
Saturday He did most of them and it ended up that they all needed to be changed. So on Sunday evening while Master watched the Broncos play and taking a much needed rest from all the work He has been going - I did the work...His work.
And okay this is going to sound so strange, but it made me really hot to be used like that...knowing He was out enjoying football while I did His work.
He also is having me go help them put together all their binders this week. And I actually feel very privileged that I get to go to work with His boss and Him to do this. All it will be is punching holes and inserting them into ringed binders, but I am serving Master in a way I don't normally and it makes me feel good.
I am going to be packing for Him and making food for Him to bring with Him to the big conference, but these other ways of serving Him has been nice and...well turned me on.
Tuesday, September 14, 2004
Saturday, September 11, 2004
Thoughts on BDSM and service...and more
I was reading Mistress Matisse’s blog…she posted a prayer. It is one of those that gets posted all over the place every so often. I have seen it for years.
I actually found the post talking about the prayer more interesting then the prayer. The post states the prayer has nothing to do with BDSM. And I agree with that. (Which I will get to in a moment.)
But first the prayer (which to me is more of a poem)…It, to me, reads as someone who has first come into D/s maybe….it is romantic hearts and flowers. It equates to that giddy feeling we get when we first met someone that just makes us all fluttery inside.
That being said if you break the prayer apart and see the mindset behind the prayer– I can see how it relates to a D/s or M/s relationship within reality. It shows mindfulness of serving and learning to come into that service with grace, devotion and dedication. All those things together bring a spiritual quality. It is that spiritual or even Zen quality that comes in the quietness of knowing you are being who you are suppose to be. And those feelings I can relate to in my relationship with Master.
I know I have said affirmations and written reflections that say similar things about my relationship with Master. I know that I have written hearts and flowers poetry to my Master and even posted in my blog for all to read. I am a sappy romantic person at times. And I hope that no one uses it against me like has been done with the person who wrote the prayer/poem.
I do hate that some people starting out (well heck even those who have been doing it a while) in D/s tend to take those prayers, the submissive creed and nine levels of submission and think that is what living 24/7 as a submissive or slave is about. When in reality most of those were probably written in the new stages of a blossoming D/s relationship….so again during the hearts and flowers stages. And again, I don’t have anything against hearts and flowers, I just wish people would open their eyes and see it is romantic hearts and flowers - which in reality is usually only a little tiny part of life.
And that is where I have a problem with Matisse’s post. Because I don’t feel she is seeing it for what it is….basically a love poem with a D/s twist. I also feel she is comparing apples and oranges in her post.
What the post talks about throughout is BDSM and I think the prayer is really geared towards service oriented D/s or M/s. Although Dominance and submission fall within the BDSM acronym - I consider BDSM and what the pray to be talking about different. To me she is comparing apples and oranges. They both are fruit but both are different fruit.
BDSM is all the kinky fun stuff to me. It is the scenes, sessions, play time…all the things that are the kinky goodness. It turns you on – makes you hot and wet. But what the prayer is talking about is the service - the dedication to that service and finding serenity in serving. (which actually at times can turn me - make me hot and wet.)
Fulfilling ones nature and calling to me are reason enough to be doing M/s or D/s. And although SM most of the time makes me wet, I still - even in that moment- am in service to my Master. And serving him is…my calling.
If a person says or writes a prayer or poem or even a few lines to meditate on to gain focus in their service, I say go for it! And I say to people reading it….we all live this lifestyle differently. Some are in it because is it who they are and others do it for fun. And neither are the wrong way to do it.
I actually found the post talking about the prayer more interesting then the prayer. The post states the prayer has nothing to do with BDSM. And I agree with that. (Which I will get to in a moment.)
But first the prayer (which to me is more of a poem)…It, to me, reads as someone who has first come into D/s maybe….it is romantic hearts and flowers. It equates to that giddy feeling we get when we first met someone that just makes us all fluttery inside.
That being said if you break the prayer apart and see the mindset behind the prayer– I can see how it relates to a D/s or M/s relationship within reality. It shows mindfulness of serving and learning to come into that service with grace, devotion and dedication. All those things together bring a spiritual quality. It is that spiritual or even Zen quality that comes in the quietness of knowing you are being who you are suppose to be. And those feelings I can relate to in my relationship with Master.
I know I have said affirmations and written reflections that say similar things about my relationship with Master. I know that I have written hearts and flowers poetry to my Master and even posted in my blog for all to read. I am a sappy romantic person at times. And I hope that no one uses it against me like has been done with the person who wrote the prayer/poem.
I do hate that some people starting out (well heck even those who have been doing it a while) in D/s tend to take those prayers, the submissive creed and nine levels of submission and think that is what living 24/7 as a submissive or slave is about. When in reality most of those were probably written in the new stages of a blossoming D/s relationship….so again during the hearts and flowers stages. And again, I don’t have anything against hearts and flowers, I just wish people would open their eyes and see it is romantic hearts and flowers - which in reality is usually only a little tiny part of life.
And that is where I have a problem with Matisse’s post. Because I don’t feel she is seeing it for what it is….basically a love poem with a D/s twist. I also feel she is comparing apples and oranges in her post.
What the post talks about throughout is BDSM and I think the prayer is really geared towards service oriented D/s or M/s. Although Dominance and submission fall within the BDSM acronym - I consider BDSM and what the pray to be talking about different. To me she is comparing apples and oranges. They both are fruit but both are different fruit.
BDSM is all the kinky fun stuff to me. It is the scenes, sessions, play time…all the things that are the kinky goodness. It turns you on – makes you hot and wet. But what the prayer is talking about is the service - the dedication to that service and finding serenity in serving. (which actually at times can turn me - make me hot and wet.)
Fulfilling ones nature and calling to me are reason enough to be doing M/s or D/s. And although SM most of the time makes me wet, I still - even in that moment- am in service to my Master. And serving him is…my calling.
If a person says or writes a prayer or poem or even a few lines to meditate on to gain focus in their service, I say go for it! And I say to people reading it….we all live this lifestyle differently. Some are in it because is it who they are and others do it for fun. And neither are the wrong way to do it.
Friday, September 10, 2004
Bruschetta Chicken Bake
I have not tried this recipe but I really like Bruschetta so this might be good. I also would change the recipe a little as I would want to make my own stuffing out of whole wheat and white bread. It looks like a comfort food recipe to me!
Bruschetta Chicken Bake
1 can diced tomatoes (14.5), undrained
2 cloves of garlic, minced
1 pkg. (6oz) Stove top Stuffing mix for Chicken
1 1/2 lbs boneless skinless chicken breast, cut into bit sized pieces
1 tsp dried basil leaves
1 cup shredded mozzarella cheese
Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Place Tomatoes with liquid in medium bowl. Add garlic and stuffing mix and 1/2 cup water; stir just until stuffing mix is moistened. Set aside.
Place chicken in 13 x 9 inch baking dish; sprinkle with basil and cheese. Top with stuffing mixture.
Bake 30 min. or until chicken is cooked through.
Bruschetta Chicken Bake
1 can diced tomatoes (14.5), undrained
2 cloves of garlic, minced
1 pkg. (6oz) Stove top Stuffing mix for Chicken
1 1/2 lbs boneless skinless chicken breast, cut into bit sized pieces
1 tsp dried basil leaves
1 cup shredded mozzarella cheese
Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Place Tomatoes with liquid in medium bowl. Add garlic and stuffing mix and 1/2 cup water; stir just until stuffing mix is moistened. Set aside.
Place chicken in 13 x 9 inch baking dish; sprinkle with basil and cheese. Top with stuffing mixture.
Bake 30 min. or until chicken is cooked through.
Thursday, September 09, 2004
I got a Spanking!
Belly pressed down on the soft bed, my bottom on display for Daddy. I lay there waiting goosepimpled, vulnerable and excited all at once. My hands clutched the blanket on the bed. Master has a tall bed and so He stood next to the bed. His hand ran lightly over my bottom and down my thighs and back up over my bottom to my back. He slowly did soft touches making my whole body start to tingle with His touch and the anticipation of the spanking I was about to receive.
I wiggled around just a little…body shaking, thighs kind of clenching and unclenching together…trying to relax my bottom before the first smack. I took some air holding it without even really realizing I was holding it.
My bottom twitched in anticipation and finally with a well practiced gesture, Daddy brought His hands up and then down across my bottom creating his own rhythm. It is the drummer in Him. The spanking start kind of light (not totally light though – ouch) – warming up my bottom to a nice glowing shade of red. The spanking progressed. At first, Master confined his blows to just one buttcheek, but then of course moved to the other. He followed a methodical rhythm that had me squirming and moaning as well as shouting ouch with each smack.
He then picked up the pace with the rhythm He had going. As He started going faster, He also started smacking harder. I am sure my bottom was bing cherry red. I would rock kind of back and forth from the pain of each stinging swat. And even with all that wiggling, Master never missed His mark. His palms landed with unerring aim and gravity….feeling my flesh swell around the pressure of His hand hitting my bottom.
Master would hear…”OWW! OH, Master!! AHH! Ouch! Master!!”
Master laughed and continued on with His sadistic streak making sure each slap He administered became more and more torturous. Master had such a willing and supple round fanny lying across His bed. It was that love hate thing that goes on so often with me. It hurt, but I kept raising my bottom up to meet the swats. My bottom felt hot and blistered. Master ended the spanking with a crescendo of slaps making me scream and moan before tucking me into bed.
I fell asleep really fast! It is such a nice way to go to bed.
I wiggled around just a little…body shaking, thighs kind of clenching and unclenching together…trying to relax my bottom before the first smack. I took some air holding it without even really realizing I was holding it.
My bottom twitched in anticipation and finally with a well practiced gesture, Daddy brought His hands up and then down across my bottom creating his own rhythm. It is the drummer in Him. The spanking start kind of light (not totally light though – ouch) – warming up my bottom to a nice glowing shade of red. The spanking progressed. At first, Master confined his blows to just one buttcheek, but then of course moved to the other. He followed a methodical rhythm that had me squirming and moaning as well as shouting ouch with each smack.
He then picked up the pace with the rhythm He had going. As He started going faster, He also started smacking harder. I am sure my bottom was bing cherry red. I would rock kind of back and forth from the pain of each stinging swat. And even with all that wiggling, Master never missed His mark. His palms landed with unerring aim and gravity….feeling my flesh swell around the pressure of His hand hitting my bottom.
Master would hear…”OWW! OH, Master!! AHH! Ouch! Master!!”
Master laughed and continued on with His sadistic streak making sure each slap He administered became more and more torturous. Master had such a willing and supple round fanny lying across His bed. It was that love hate thing that goes on so often with me. It hurt, but I kept raising my bottom up to meet the swats. My bottom felt hot and blistered. Master ended the spanking with a crescendo of slaps making me scream and moan before tucking me into bed.
I fell asleep really fast! It is such a nice way to go to bed.
Horoscopes
Masters:
SAGITTARIUS (Nov 22–Dec 21): There are issues stewing from the past few days, and you may feel as if you are passing through the eye of the storm. Perhaps you are, but it's difficult to know in which direction you'll turn once the turmoil settles. Stay focused on your career. It's still going to pay off, as long as you stay patient. If you do lose patience, however, the meltdown can be very powerful and therapeutic for you.
mine:
LIBRA (Sep 23–Oct 22): It's a day for emotional dialogues as you confront the widening gulf between your thoughts and feelings. These internal "conversations" don't need another person; they can be expressed internally, as you observe the conflict between two active inner voices. Of course, it can also be expressed outwardly in a relationship. Although you have an opportunity to open wide to another person, you should try to steer clear of situations that would require you to stay strictly in the logical and rational realms.
Music: French Kiss 2
Mood: good :)
SAGITTARIUS (Nov 22–Dec 21): There are issues stewing from the past few days, and you may feel as if you are passing through the eye of the storm. Perhaps you are, but it's difficult to know in which direction you'll turn once the turmoil settles. Stay focused on your career. It's still going to pay off, as long as you stay patient. If you do lose patience, however, the meltdown can be very powerful and therapeutic for you.
mine:
LIBRA (Sep 23–Oct 22): It's a day for emotional dialogues as you confront the widening gulf between your thoughts and feelings. These internal "conversations" don't need another person; they can be expressed internally, as you observe the conflict between two active inner voices. Of course, it can also be expressed outwardly in a relationship. Although you have an opportunity to open wide to another person, you should try to steer clear of situations that would require you to stay strictly in the logical and rational realms.
Music: French Kiss 2
Mood: good :)
S&M Political Video
Yesterday Master had sent me a news link talking about a video of a Dominatrix beating on a man playing the part of Bush. Well this morning someone on live journal posted a link to the video. It is a music video and the Dominatrix is played by Dita Von Tesse. Dita is very yummy!
here is the link...
http://www.agentprovocateur.com/lost_control.php
here is the link...
http://www.agentprovocateur.com/lost_control.php
Wednesday, September 08, 2004
Going back to my roots....OH NO!
Okay so I went over to Chelle's and she had the one from Iowa where she I believe is originally from...which inspired me to go read this list about North Dakota ...
I was laughing so hard Master thought I was going to pass out.
I was born and lived in North Dakota until I was 10 years old. Most of my relatives live there or in Minnesota.
I related to this list all to well....that is VERY scary. And like Chelle...I am thinking I should be embarrassed!
I was laughing so hard Master thought I was going to pass out.
I was born and lived in North Dakota until I was 10 years old. Most of my relatives live there or in Minnesota.
I related to this list all to well....that is VERY scary. And like Chelle...I am thinking I should be embarrassed!
You Know You're From North Dakota When... |
Vacation means going to Medora. You've seen all the biggest bands, 20 yrs after they were popular. East means to Fargo. You know several people who have hit a buffalo. You've ridden the school bus for an hour each way. You only lock your car in August, so it doesn't get filled with zucchini. You think 4 major food groups are: beef, chokecherry wine, pork and Jell-O with marshmallows. You carry a blizzard survival kit in your car 12 months a year. You find 3 feet of snow a minor inconvenience. You know if another North Dakotan is from southern, middle or northern ND as soon as they open their mouth. There is a Dairy Queen in every town with a population of 1000 or more, but McDonalds are spread out every 100 miles. You have more miles on your snow blower than your car. You know Ole & Lena personally. Though your not breaking the law, you break into a cold sweat when to game warden appears. You owe more money on your snowmobile than your car. You find it exciting to stare through a hole in the ice and look at the bottom. You can tell the difference between a gopher and a chipmunk at 300 yards. You think white rice is exotic and wild rice is hot dish. Somewhere in the state is a piece of frozen metal with bits of your tongue stuck to it. When you win the prize for the smallest fish, you're proud of it. You hate "Fargo" but realize your entire family has the accent. People borrow things to you. You keep the snow tires on your truck all year because it isn't worth taking them off for only two months. You are proud that your state makes the national news 96 nights each year because Bismarck is the coldest spot in the nation. You think a basketball team consists of twelve white boys. Someone in a store offers you assistance, and they don't work there. You're polite to telemarketers. You have a nickname for your chain saw and you pat it on the fuel tank at the end of a hard day's sawing. You may not have actually eaten it, but you have heard of Lutefisk. You go to a high school basketball game, the score is 12-8 at halftime... and you don't think there's anything strange about that. You know how to say Fargo and Minot. You never had to rewind any part of "Fargo" because you missed some of the dialogue. Your town isn't trying to be ironic when it plans a "Winter Carnival." Your bank has the name of your town included in its name. You think that "UFF DA" is a standard English phrase. You can recite, from memory, more than a half-dozen "Ole and Lena" jokes. Every time you see moonlight on a lake you think of a dancing bear, and sing, gently, "From the land of sky-blue waters... Hamm's, the beer refreshing. Hamm's, the beer refreshing." Your dog dies, you lose your job, and your car breaks down, all on the same day, and the first thought that comes to your mind is, "It could be worse!" Your definition of a small town is one that has only one bar. "Down south" means Aberdeen. You have no problem spelling "Wahpeton". You expect to be excused from school for deer hunting season and harvesting. Your soup du jour at your hometown cafe is always beer cheese or knoephla. You think of something other than the Bible when you hear the words "Great Flood". You drive to town during a blizzard just to see if the weatherman knows what he's talking about. You assume everyone has seen northern lights and sundogs. You cry when a tree is cut down but complain when a new one is planted because it blocks the view. You think cold weather gear is a bottle of schnapps. After you discuss the weather, conversation declines. You understand "AYH, y'betchyah" means either "I agree" or "You're full of it" and know the difference. You grew up thinking rice was only for dessert. You think that ketchup is a little too spicy. You didn't know there was a Red River Valley in Texas The band you choose for your wedding has to know rock, country, and polkas. Young boys still get BB guns for Christmas. You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from North Dakota. |
You Know You're From Cleveland When...
Okay so I don't live in Cleveland anymore but I got a lot of these so I had to share....for those that know Cleveland.
A real journal entry coming later.
A real journal entry coming later.
You Know You're From Cleveland When... |
Your idea of fine cuisine includes keilbasa and Stroh's beer You think the Antichrist walks among us and moved to Baltimore in 1995 You refer to Pittsburgh as a Third World nation You have to look at a map before you realize Cincinnati is NOT in Kentucky You think political correctness involves using the term "certain ethnic" when telling a joke You believe plastic lawn flamingos are essential in any landscaping project Your second car is completely dissolved by salt by the time April rolls around The phrase "lake effect" strikes terror in your heart You actually remember when Dennis Kucinich was mayor You see nothing wrong with wearing white sox with black shoes, even when wearing a tux Party music involves an accordion You always knew you lived in the Rock n Roll Capital of the World You know more about Frankie Yankovic than Weird Al Yankovic Tourists ask you what time the river catches fire You believe the Second Coming meant the Browns returning in 1999 You don't really know any homosexuals, you just know that there are a lot of them in Lakewood. You know you don't really have an accent, the rest of the world does. You hear there are always famous people in town, but you have never seen one. You hate country music, don't know anyone that does like country music, and yet WGAR just won the country music station of the year. You take credit for Cedar Point even though it is 2 hours away. You honestly believe that Cleveland is the best city in the world. The Tri-C jingle "students for life" scares the hell out of you. You take Dead Man's Curve at 60 mph holding your breath. You know about the Eastside/Westside rivalry, but don't really understand it. "Good Morning from the Buzzard Morning Zoo" is a jingle you'll never forget. Your neighborhood schools went without sports because all the senior citizens refused to pass the levies. You actually know how to pronounce Cuyahoga. You can't tell Brook Park, Brooklyn, or Old Brooklyn apart. You see Christmas lights still up in July. You love BW-3, but have no clue what the heck weck is. You find yourself singing "Garfield 1-2323" in the shower. You're still dumbfounded by the Leaping Fountain in Tower City. You have never ridden in a taxi. You wear shorts the first day of the year it isn't below 30 and snowing, just because you can. You have gotten 3 speeding tickets, and they are all from the mile long stretch of a suburb named Linndale. You have no idea how exactly to get to the Flats, you just kind of end up on a bank and start partying. You really don't know what the Warehouse District is, you just know that it's a great place to party. You know who the Jake really is You hate Baltimore and you have never been there. St. Patty's Day is your number one holiday, and you aren't Irish. You're still relishing 1987 when we ALMOST made it to the Super Bowl. You counted down with the monument in Tower City to the exact second in 1999 when the Browns came back. You heard Bill Clinton and Drew Carey love Parma Pierogies, but you have yet to ever eat there. You know Tower City isn't a city at all. You're Polish. Stories of Little Italy still send chills down your spine. At least half of your wardrobe is Tribe apparel. You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Cleveland. |
Monday, September 06, 2004
Quote
Beauty is desired in order that it may be befouled; not for its own sake, but for the joy brought by the certainty of profaning it. ~ Georges Bataille
I think that is hot! It is George Bataille paraphrasing DeSade. I am on a Live Journal community that posts things such as it all the time. For me often on the community it is the kind of stuff that I go oh that why did that make my heart beat a little fast...why did that make me oh so hot.
Sunday, September 05, 2004
Happy Birthday Honey!
I hope that you have a great birthday!
On to other news...
Well I am sitting here with much shorter hair. When I moved here my hair was down to the top of my bottom – all one length. Then in December of 2003 I had a lot of damage to my hair – the dry weather here is not nice to my hair. Anyway, Master thought it would be good if I got it cut a little shorter so then it was just hitting my mid-back.
Now…
Well it is maybe an inch to 2 inches below my shoulders. And I now have bangs.
I am not sure if I like it. It was/is a hard change for me. But it was what Master wanted. And so my hair got chopped off for Him. He really likes it so that is good.
One good thing I thought of last night in regards to it…is that I can put it in pigtails. I realized this when Daddy was tucking me into bed. When He tucks me in bed, the little girl in me comes out so easily. Anyway, I realized that my hair now will probably look very cute in pigtails. My hair was so long that I had those long pigtails and it just did not look good on me. So one evening we might be having a Daddy/little girl night. I will wear pigtails and other little girl things. We will watch Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory and I can color pictures for Daddy.
I hope that you have a great birthday!
On to other news...
Well I am sitting here with much shorter hair. When I moved here my hair was down to the top of my bottom – all one length. Then in December of 2003 I had a lot of damage to my hair – the dry weather here is not nice to my hair. Anyway, Master thought it would be good if I got it cut a little shorter so then it was just hitting my mid-back.
Now…
Well it is maybe an inch to 2 inches below my shoulders. And I now have bangs.
I am not sure if I like it. It was/is a hard change for me. But it was what Master wanted. And so my hair got chopped off for Him. He really likes it so that is good.
One good thing I thought of last night in regards to it…is that I can put it in pigtails. I realized this when Daddy was tucking me into bed. When He tucks me in bed, the little girl in me comes out so easily. Anyway, I realized that my hair now will probably look very cute in pigtails. My hair was so long that I had those long pigtails and it just did not look good on me. So one evening we might be having a Daddy/little girl night. I will wear pigtails and other little girl things. We will watch Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory and I can color pictures for Daddy.
Friday, September 03, 2004
Buddhist Wisdom
Since your mind is not physical,
No one else can destroy it.
But because of its attachments to the body,
It is harmed by physical suffering.
-Bodhicharyavatara
Direction
In watching a few relationships, I have noticed a lot of struggling with submission because of lack direction from the Dominant. The submissive/slave wants to submit and wants to bend to the will of their Dominant but the Dominant is not showing her where he wants her to bend and submit.
I have been in this place in past relationships and also seen others go through this as well. Often after a submissive expresses the lack of direction, I have heard, "well you just need to obey." But if the Dominant is not giving anything to obey how is she suppose to obey? I think Dominants might confuse direction with active Dominance. (Which active Dominance is a topic for another time.) Now that might be the case as well but direction does not have to be a constant active.
Here is an analogy to try to clarify my point…
Lets use a recent college graduates as the example. They desire to have a job in their field. They know their field and enjoy it. Then they land that job….the job they think is just perfect. Now just because a person knows the field does not mean they know how to do the job. They would not know what to do without direction. So, the boss needs to tell them how to do the job. Otherwise, they will be left to their own ideas of the field instead of the actual job. And thus the job probably will not get done how the boss wants.
And the same goes in these cases I am talking about…
Submissives might know that they are submissive or slave. They most likely have a desire to be in a D/s or M/s relationship. They probably have a desire to serve and please. But without the direction of the Dominant they will go by what they know about their desires instead of what the Dominant wants them to do.
So, these women I see struggling are submissive, but they are lacking direction. The Dominants needs to let the submissive know how he wants to be served and pleased. He needs to let the submissive know where the boundaries are in their relationship. He needs to define the relationship so that she knows where to go and what to do more easily.
When those things are not expressed or communicated the submissive most likely will fall back on what she thinks is best. Now, to me, that is the submissive leading not the Dominant. And doesn’t the Dominant want to lead in D/s and M/s power dynamics?
I can hear some people might say she could learn by watching. And I agree with that to a point. But without some initial direction she will go in a direction she thinks is best because she will be in the dark on what the Dominant is actually wanting.
So, if he wants it to be about him – to me he needs to make it about him by directing.
I have been in this place in past relationships and also seen others go through this as well. Often after a submissive expresses the lack of direction, I have heard, "well you just need to obey." But if the Dominant is not giving anything to obey how is she suppose to obey? I think Dominants might confuse direction with active Dominance. (Which active Dominance is a topic for another time.) Now that might be the case as well but direction does not have to be a constant active.
Here is an analogy to try to clarify my point…
Lets use a recent college graduates as the example. They desire to have a job in their field. They know their field and enjoy it. Then they land that job….the job they think is just perfect. Now just because a person knows the field does not mean they know how to do the job. They would not know what to do without direction. So, the boss needs to tell them how to do the job. Otherwise, they will be left to their own ideas of the field instead of the actual job. And thus the job probably will not get done how the boss wants.
And the same goes in these cases I am talking about…
Submissives might know that they are submissive or slave. They most likely have a desire to be in a D/s or M/s relationship. They probably have a desire to serve and please. But without the direction of the Dominant they will go by what they know about their desires instead of what the Dominant wants them to do.
So, these women I see struggling are submissive, but they are lacking direction. The Dominants needs to let the submissive know how he wants to be served and pleased. He needs to let the submissive know where the boundaries are in their relationship. He needs to define the relationship so that she knows where to go and what to do more easily.
When those things are not expressed or communicated the submissive most likely will fall back on what she thinks is best. Now, to me, that is the submissive leading not the Dominant. And doesn’t the Dominant want to lead in D/s and M/s power dynamics?
I can hear some people might say she could learn by watching. And I agree with that to a point. But without some initial direction she will go in a direction she thinks is best because she will be in the dark on what the Dominant is actually wanting.
So, if he wants it to be about him – to me he needs to make it about him by directing.
Gmail Invites...
I have A LOT of gmail invites....between my regular email and our website email. So if anyone wants one..or knows someone who wants one please have them write me at danaewhispering@gmail.com
Thursday, September 02, 2004
Life Update
Okay so Working Girls is done. Pussy Ranch is done. I know there are a few other blogs that ended also. Please no more!
I have become hooked on The West Wing lately. It happened the other night Master was busy working so I was folding clothes while watching TV. Bravo plays The West Wing nightly. I happen to watch it the night they show the first episode of season 5 (7A WF 83429) - Zoey Bartlett has been kidnapped. And of course, it drew me in….since then they have been recorded nightly. Master seems to be hooked also now. The song at the end of that first episode was incredible. I cried just from the song alone. So of course I had to go find it….with Master's help….It was Sanvean by Lisa Gerrard.
This week and last, I have felt very down. Tired, drained and feeling like I am trudging through my submission. It feels very murky. I don't have the desire to submit. I am and I want to be Master's slave, but I just feel so tired. And every little thing I do feels like it takes so much effort.
And then today I had the bouts of feeling like I could do nothing right. That I can't please Master no matter what I do.
I once had someone tell me they never heard of submissive burning out. But I am here to say I know more submissives that seem to go through it then dominants and I wonder why that is?
It is not like I don't want to serve Master….I do but it seems to be lacking the enthusiasm that I had…
I am sure it is just stress. I am so worn out. I have not been sleeping well for about 3 weeks. And I know Master is stressed and I feel that too. I also think it has something to do with the time of the year. As I remember feeling like this in the past at this time of the year.
I have become hooked on The West Wing lately. It happened the other night Master was busy working so I was folding clothes while watching TV. Bravo plays The West Wing nightly. I happen to watch it the night they show the first episode of season 5 (7A WF 83429) - Zoey Bartlett has been kidnapped. And of course, it drew me in….since then they have been recorded nightly. Master seems to be hooked also now. The song at the end of that first episode was incredible. I cried just from the song alone. So of course I had to go find it….with Master's help….It was Sanvean by Lisa Gerrard.
This week and last, I have felt very down. Tired, drained and feeling like I am trudging through my submission. It feels very murky. I don't have the desire to submit. I am and I want to be Master's slave, but I just feel so tired. And every little thing I do feels like it takes so much effort.
And then today I had the bouts of feeling like I could do nothing right. That I can't please Master no matter what I do.
I once had someone tell me they never heard of submissive burning out. But I am here to say I know more submissives that seem to go through it then dominants and I wonder why that is?
It is not like I don't want to serve Master….I do but it seems to be lacking the enthusiasm that I had…
I am sure it is just stress. I am so worn out. I have not been sleeping well for about 3 weeks. And I know Master is stressed and I feel that too. I also think it has something to do with the time of the year. As I remember feeling like this in the past at this time of the year.
Wednesday, September 01, 2004
Salisbury Steak
1 1/2 pounds ground round (I use about half ground round and half ground turkey to cut down on some fat)
1/4 cup finely chopped onion (the orginal called for 1/2 to maybe a cup but I am not a big onion fan)
1/2 cup long-grain rice -- cooked ( I have left out on occassion when I did not have any on hand)
1/4 teaspoon pepper
1 egg white
1 cup sliced onions (I leave them in their rings)
1 cup mushrooms -- sliced
2 Cups beef broth
4 tablespoons worcestershire sauce
2 tablespoons cornstarch
3 tablespoons water
Combine ground round, onion, rice, pepper, 2 tablespoons of worcestershire sauce, and egg white in a medium sized bowl; stir well. Divide mixture into 6 equal portions; shape each portion into 1 inch thick patty. Coat a nonstick skillet with cooking spray. Heat over medium high heat until hot. Add patties and cook until browned on both sides (about 4 minutes per side). Transfer to a plate and keep warm. Wipe skillet clean with a paper towel. Coat skillet with cooking spray; heat over medium high heat. Add onions and mushrooms; saute 5 minutes. Add broth,remaining worcestershire sauce. Cook for 10 more minutes, stirring occasionally. Return patties to skillet. Cover, reduce heat, and simmer 15 minutes. Transfer patties to serving platter, and keep warm. Combine cornstarch and water; add to broth mixture, stirring well. Bring to a boil; cook 1 minute, stirring constantly.Spoon sauce evenly over patties.
1/4 cup finely chopped onion (the orginal called for 1/2 to maybe a cup but I am not a big onion fan)
1/2 cup long-grain rice -- cooked ( I have left out on occassion when I did not have any on hand)
1/4 teaspoon pepper
1 egg white
1 cup sliced onions (I leave them in their rings)
1 cup mushrooms -- sliced
2 Cups beef broth
4 tablespoons worcestershire sauce
2 tablespoons cornstarch
3 tablespoons water
Combine ground round, onion, rice, pepper, 2 tablespoons of worcestershire sauce, and egg white in a medium sized bowl; stir well. Divide mixture into 6 equal portions; shape each portion into 1 inch thick patty. Coat a nonstick skillet with cooking spray. Heat over medium high heat until hot. Add patties and cook until browned on both sides (about 4 minutes per side). Transfer to a plate and keep warm. Wipe skillet clean with a paper towel. Coat skillet with cooking spray; heat over medium high heat. Add onions and mushrooms; saute 5 minutes. Add broth,remaining worcestershire sauce. Cook for 10 more minutes, stirring occasionally. Return patties to skillet. Cover, reduce heat, and simmer 15 minutes. Transfer patties to serving platter, and keep warm. Combine cornstarch and water; add to broth mixture, stirring well. Bring to a boil; cook 1 minute, stirring constantly.Spoon sauce evenly over patties.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
