Expectations

“A slave cannot have expectations.”

Whenever I read that for some reason I always get a little upset by it. I have read it and heard it manytimes and it always makes me feel just a little put off by it. I even remember when I was first chatting with Master before being owned by Him – He said something similar and I got all up in arms about it.

But at the same time, I have written posts about not liking when I have expectations.

Maybe I need to look at definitions…Because I have written about expectations before and I think I am confusing some words. In my mind I see it as hope or wishing on some cases and other cases I see as in counting on something because it is duty or honor bound or someone has given their word.

When I read or hear “a slave can’t have any expectations,” I interpret it, as slaves can’t demand anything. And I get that totally. But then when I sit with it more and think of how I define expectation…then I get a little confused on why slaves can’t have expectations.

So now, here are the definitions…
Expectation:
Function: noun
1 : the act or state of expecting : ANTICIPATION
2 a : something expected b : basis for expecting : ASSURANCE (they have every expectation of success) c : prospects of inheritance -- usually used in plural
3 : the state of being expected
4 a : EXPECTANCY 2b b : EXPECTED VALUE
Synonyms expectancy
Related Word design, hope, intention, motive, notion; prospect

Expect:
1 archaic : WAIT, STAY
2 : to look forward
3 : to be pregnant : await the birth of one's child -- used in progressive tenses (she's expecting next month)
transitive senses
1 archaic : AWAIT
2 : to anticipate or look forward to the coming or occurrence of (we expect them any minute now) (expected a telephone call)
3 : SUPPOSE, THINK
4 a : to consider probable or certain (expect that things will improve) b : to consider reasonable, due, or necessary c : to consider bound in duty or obligated (they expect you to pay your bills)
Synonyms await, count (on or upon), hope, look
Related Word anticipate, apprehend, divine, foreknow, foresee

I am going to ramble a bit…

To say a slave can’t have expectations is to say a slave can’t have things that I think are positive to the relationship or also just cutting off a natural human response to me.


Anticipation or to look forward to:
There are things that I do look forward to and anticipate with Master.

Such as Master bought rope at Thunder….I look forward to Him using it on me. Master learned some cool things in the duct tape class….I am anticipating him using them on me after He gets some pipe and sports wrap.

Hope:
There are times I hope for things with Master. And I have always considered those expectations. I don’t demand them, don’t even voice them out loud and know Master does not have to do anything he does not want to do – but I hope sometimes for things.

Such as if we have a weekend with nothing scheduled I will hope that we will play or have sex. And when it does not happen I get disappointed – not only because we did not but also because I even hoped for it in the first place.

So, is hoping for those things bad? I mean is a slave never suppose to hope for things?

Because I can take it further - I expect (read hope) that I become better in my service to Master. I expect (read hope) that our path keeps moving forward. I expect (read hope) that it becomes easier for me to surrender each time I am faced with a challenge. All those expectations are positive hopes right? So, aren’t some expectations good?

Okay now from another angle of the definitions….

Count on due to duty or honor bound:

Master expects me to serve him and I will even when I don’t feel like it because I am honor bound to being Master’s slave.

So flip it around….can’t I expect Master to own me? I mean I know He could get sick and tired of me one day and release, sell or give me away – but knowing Him as I do – if it were ever getting to something like that He would be telling me about it before He actually did the deed. So, up until that ever happens (hoping that it does not) – can’t I expect to be owned by Him? Also, He has told me He will control me so can’t I expect that from Him?

Another example that is not so broad…Master has told me He would not pursue anyone outside our relationship until we had our foundation solid and that we were heading steadily into the direction he wants us to be so can’t I expect that He will honor that?

Isn’t having expectations just a human thing…just like emotions. Just because I am a slave does not mean I can shut my emotions off – so just because I am a slave I can’t shut my expectations off.

I totally understand a slave can’t demand to have her hopes met…they are wishes and if they come true great…if not we need to get over them and let them go. But I still think taking away those hopes…takes away something positive and good also.

I think am over analyzing the word expectation and the phrase "A slave cannot have expectations."