Well I was informed I was wrong about my disclaimer in Friday’s post lol
Tomorrow will be a new year. 2001. Wow! Happy New Year everyone!
Tonight of course is the anniversary of my rapes. So far this year has been easier to deal with then last years. I hope it continues to be this good all day : )
Daddy has been trying hard this week to be here for me emotionally because the week of December 31, 2000 I usually have problems with flashbacks and such. And I have had those problems this week but really not as bad as in the past. Which I am VERY thankful for!
It is snowing right now, but to me it is the beautiful kind of snow. It is coming down heavy but big flakes. I have some Ottmar Liebert in the cd player watching the snow and chatting with Di online. Very peaceful right now.
I want to thank Grumbler and wench for my great birthday/Christmas presents. : ) Back at the beginning of Nov someone gave me a present in front of Lucar and he said “you are still celebrating your birthday.” Well I can say I am still celebrating it now as it heads into 2001.
I am missing Lauren lots. I got to talk to her online Friday for a little bit, but still it does not really stop the aching inside. I am worried about her and Daddy – this 5 months from being a way from each other is going to be harder then I thought on both of them.
Honeyrose wrote me this week but it just made me wonder what is going on with her MORE. (I got 2 more emails since writing this and she seems to be good but I still worry about her.) I miss her lots and am trying to get my plans firmed up to go see her in Europe. I hope to be going for 2 months.
The first movie I saw with Honeyrose was Practical Magic second was Meet Joe Black. Both movies have made impacts on me. Jackie has the soundtrack to Practical Magic so she is connected to the movie now too.
On Christmas I watched it on cable 2 times. I sat and cried some sad missing Honeyrose and Jackie and other good tears because it brought up good feeling for both of them. The soundtrack is awesome. One song I think after seeing the movie and where it fit in the movie made me think of everyone in my life…Daddy, Jackie and Honeyrose….
A Case of You by Joni Mitchell
Just before our love got lost you said
"I am as constant as a northern star"
And I said, "Constant in the darkness
Where's that at?
If you want me I'll be in the bar"
On the back of a cartoon coaster
In the blue TV screen light
I drew a map of Canada
Oh Canada
And I sketched your face on it twice
Oh you are in my blood like holy wine
Oh and you taste so bitter but you taste so sweet
Oh I could drink a case of you
I could drink a case of you darling
Still I'd be on my feet
I'd still be on my feet
Oh I am a lonely painter
I live in a box of paints
I'm frightened by the devil
And I'm drawn to those ones that ain't afraid
I remember that time that you told me, you said
"Love is touching souls"
Surely you touched mine
"Cause part of you pours out of me
In these lines from time to time
Oh you are in my blood like holy wine
And you taste so bitter but you taste so sweet
Oh I could drink a case of you
I could drink a case of you darling
Still I'd be on my feet
I'd still be on my feet
I met a woman
She had a mouth like yours
She knew your life
She knew your devils and your deeds
And she said
Color "Go to him, stay with him if you can
Oh but be prepared to bleed"
Oh but you are in my blood you're my holy wine
Oh and you taste so bitter but you taste so sweet
Oh I could drink a case of you darling
Still I'd be on my feet
Still I'd be on my feet
I'd still be on my feet
I wish everyone a Happy New Year….
peace & serenity,
danae
