Sunday, June 29, 2008

Does the D/s fade?

Is it unavoidable for the D/s to fade or become sporadic in a long-term D/s relationship?

I think it is a common misunderstanding that the D/s is fading. But to me once you get to know each other and the honeymoon periods ends --- we are actually in the real state of the relationship. And I think we tend to forget to enjoy that state. We just keep thinking back on the honeymoon period and saying why can't it be like that. When in reality, that wasn't the real state of how things would be long term. So D/s isn't fading. The new relationship energy and honeymoon period is fading and real life is left in its place.

The power dynamic we have was set in place is still there. It is there even more to me now. I see myself as slave more now then I did at that time. Because now I feel I serve him more. Those early days he had to have much more focus on me and attention to train me and also just because I was a needy girl. Now he doesn't.

I think sometimes maybe we are more comfortable with the struggles and excitement that happens in the beginning of the relationship then the just everyday-ness that life has to it. It took a while for me to be grateful for the everyday ordinary quality my life has to it - when I was so used to the chaos of my life before Master. And I have learned to appreciate that I am owned, serve an amazing man and get peace from that.


  1. Wow. Today of all days, I really needed to be reminded of this, so thank you. I'd kind of lost track of the very important reality of the situation! I wonder how the folks whose D/s just intensifies are doing that...


  2. Whoops, sorry--that was me, just a different link. Dang google accounts! :)


  3. Very nicely Said, Danae. Sometimes we just miss drama, I guess.

  4. There's a saying in Spain that I'm mangling, the first two or three years are for fun, after that it's for comfort.

    I can't imagine it doing anything but fading over time. Any other way would be exhausting.

    I always assumed that's why Cosmo runs articles on "Spicing up your sex life after a few years of marriage" every other issue?


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...