Wednesday, October 23, 2002

Broken

I am home from being broken. He breaks me so easily. He uses and abuses me in a way that pushes all my buttons. Things I haven't ever even said outloud.

My bruises from my birthday are still bright on my skin and new bruises forming on top. I like the look of the bruises on top of bruises. 

Our time together feels violent. It feels like abuse.  I am sobbing and feel the fear just shaking through my body telling me to run. But I can't. I stay there and take it. He doesn't restrain me. He wants me to submit to his sadism fully and willingly. 

So today I am feeling broke and battered.  I feel like me again.

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