Still coughing! Being sick gets me really down. And so I have been kind of down lately. Add to it I had my period so that just added more to my mood.
I had a meltdown 2 weekends ago where I thought maybe I wasn't a slave because I don't feel, think, react the way other slaves/submissives seem too. I read other things people go through and feel and think I don't go through that. I thought I was just nothing...and everyone else is in the lifestyle and well I am just here doing "whatever the hell it is that I do." So I had a pity party over the doubts. In the end it was really silly as I don't want to be like anyone but me.
Then this last weekend I had a 2 day migraine from hell again where the pain was so bad that I am kind of fuzzy about details of Saturday. So, I didn't accomplish much this weekend. Master had to run errands without me and take care of things he normally doesn't...so of course I was having guilt over that too.
Sunday evening we enjoyed dinner and then watched Big Love on HBO. I liked it. It was entertaining. Although I have to say I was analyzing it from the wives perspective a lot as some of the reactions and characteristics of the wives reminded me of my poly experiences. I think there is a lot of potential with the character development and I look forward to watching it again.
Here are some links for news articles regarding Big Love....
Village Voice - All in the Family
HBO gives us 'Big Love,' a polygamy drama
'Big Love' New HBO series feature 1 husband 3 wives
Will the polygamy debate ever be the same?
Big Love, from the Set
Utahns react to HBO's 'Big Love'