March Q & A: Communicating Needs

How do you communicate a need to your Owner without making it sound like an order/demand? I realize that at times it can be in the verbage we use, the tone of our voices, but if it is a true need and you have already communicated, and the Owner does not pick up on it, how do you further communicate?

You are right it is just the verbiage and tone. I just try to ask clearly without emotion. That is at times very hard for me as I am a very sensitive person. If I have communicated it and it still feels like it hasn't been resolved then I ask to discuss it again. Maybe Master feels it is not a need he can provide and I didn't get that he felt that way. Maybe he feels it is a want more then a need. There have been things that he didn't feel are needs and of course when I examined it more it was a want. So I just learned to let go of the emotions I attached to it making myself think it was a need. Maybe I just didn't communicate effectively because at times it sounds clear in my head but what he hears and what I think I said don't match up. So I just ask for further clarification. And then go from there.

I know none of what I am saying is new. I mean it is a pat answer that everyone gives. But really it is how I handle it. Honestly I do do get frustrated and snap at times. Of course it isn't what I want or he wants obviously but it does happen. All I can do is apologize and move on -- and try harder the next time in expressing myself.


Please remember you can still ask questions here! Or over on my LJ.