Hide Away

The last few days I have been thinking about lots of different things. Some I am sure I will get to if I ramble on for a while lol

I have talked to Honey a few times the last week and that has been nice. I miss her. She is going through a lot right now. And I just hope that she does what she needs to make herself happy. Because she deserves to be happy!

Sir Nick....not sure what to say about him.

It has been very hard on me not having contact with him. I understand and am proud of him for all he gives to his work. But even though I am more used to it at the same time I am not....or not that...but that I do not like it. Our first month of chatting online was pure bliss. He was thoughtful, funny, Dominant, and so much more. We would arrange to meet online and if I was not there he would worry. When I would sign on he would ask me how my day was going and cared and wanted to hear. And it was nice to have someone put energy into me that I have always put into others.

Friday will be 3 months of us knowing each other and getting to know each other online. Next week it will be 2 months of it being like this...hardly any contact and.....so I wrote an email last night and have not heard an answer from it.

I am sad and scared. I want to curl in a little ball and hide away. I want to stop all these feeling I am feeling. I want to escape.

So strange, in this moment of being very sad, I am also feeling deep feelings of submission. deep need to serve. deep need to be demure and pleasing.

There have been things happening in my life but nothing that I can think of right at this moment. I just have lots on my mind. And am wondering where my life is going right in this moment.

peace,
danae