A Day Off....

A while back someone talked about having "a day off." Now her experiences and my experiences are very different as we are different people...just as a disclaimer that my views and thoughts on a day off will be different.

Since reading that entry I have thought about what if I had a day off. And I have come to the conclusion that I don't think I could truly have a day off from being Master's slave. I don't think I could turn off all the things I do to serve Master. I don't think I could turn off - the surrender and enslavement. Because they are just a part of my muscles -- they move to what needs to be done to serve and obey Master. It is always going in my mind....it is a constant of what do I need to do next in service to Master. I relax at times...but not just totally take a day off.

Yesterday Master went out of town and this subject popped into my mind because I was looking around the house taking a mental survey of what I wanted to do while Master was gone. And instead I decided to pour my glass of wine and relax. It was divine. I enjoyed it so much.

That does not mean I don't want to be Master's slave or serve Him. I am just saying that there are times I like to relax. I often think that is why my art is so important to me as it is one time that I can just fall into it and not think of too much. I still make sure Master has something to drink, ask him if he needs anything and if he calls me I drop what I am doing to do what he wants - in the midst of that art time. So again it does not completely turn off. It just stays idle in the background for a bit and the same goes with when I had the glass of wine last night.

I always feel like Master's slave no matter if I am relaxing and enjoying a glass of wine, creating art, doing my daily chores, in the grocery store, around his parents. I am always His.

Before I left for Servant's Retreat Master told me to relax and say what I wanted, what I needed and not to censor with the filter I have on always -- that I am Master's slave and so I represent him. And I appreciated him telling me that because I needed to hear it to be able to do that.

And because He wasn't there I think it was probably the closest I got to taking a day off. Because I was not being on attention of what He might need, what to be doing and so on.