Not So Good

Music: Soundtrack to Dances with Wolves

Friday....

Not even sure I know how to describe today. It was just a f**ked up day.

Early in the morning I was talking to Kevin and of course that did not go very well. I mean he always sticks by me but the conversation overall I just did not think went well.

I talked about Todd a lot. I have been dreaming about Todd and someone else. And thinking about him lots so wonder if that is a clue to what is going on with him and her.

I then go to bed get up to a migraine and my phones not working AGAIN! So that peeved me. Got that all worked out and then had something happen with one of my employees. So that has been plaguing me all day.

I called Di as she is my best friend and needed her help. I was kind of sad after my conversation with her but at this point with what is going on with me I had to let it go.

I have had people in the community here being so supportive of me today. I am actually thankful to have made so many good friends there. And then Kevin was online.....I felt more then ever today he wished he could be here....right here with me to help me get through this. It was good to feel that from him.

When I signed online, I had an offline message from Nick. He had a very bad day too. It was something he found out last night might happen. I was crossing my fingers for him and hoping would not happen but it did. So I was feeling bad for him and wishing I could be there for him. He does not know about what happened with me yet today. I am kind of nervous how he is going to react.

I had all these things I wanted to write about...feelings about failing, succeeding and progressing. But with all that happened today....my brain is fried.

Saturday night is Carpe Diem. Kevin told me to go so that I got my mind off things and that I was around friends. And I am sure he is right.

Well, I have laundry in and then am going to bed, as I have to be up at 6:30am to go to breakfast with a friend.

peace,
danae