Dark

Music: Janet Jackson

Life is fun lol

Work today was kind of stressful as I had phone problems and another problem that is a kind that freaks me out in my business.

Tonight I talked to Nick. He has lots of stress going on so we were not able to talk about the things we were going to. And I understood that completely. So this weekend we are going to discuss it. Tomorrow morning I will be thinking him lots!

Last night Kevin and I talked about my weight. He let me talk and did not comment or try to tell me how to fix it. He is the first person to ever have handled it that way. And it is because I asked him for help not because he is trying to change me. So there is a big difference then others in my past.

It is coming up on a year...when I was in Germany. People would think of going to Europe was full of fond memories and there were some good ones do not get me wrong but so much of my trip was full of pain. I cried more then then I probably cried all last year.

I want to have someone in my life right now that I want to be with and have sex with. Okay weird topic change.

I woke up from a dream last night full of dark desires and just being f***ed...hard. Going to share some of my dark desires.....here....

* being yanked around by my hair with it to be positioned to give sexually service. And then having my long hair placed to cover my face and making me continue to work under that shroud, not fit to meet the Dominants eyes.

* Being made to drink out of the toilet.

* Having my face shoved in the toilet and held there. Having my face held there and then f**ked in the ass.

* Cigarettes (even though I do not like smoke and don't smoke)......being bound and helpless - gagged - beaten and out of it slightly and then seeing Him smoke. Takes a couple puffs and then.....touch the lit end of a cigarette to my breasts. leaving His initials on my breasts.

just a few out of MANY...I have flash before my eyes......

peace,
danae