Music: The Verve - Urban Hymns
Busy busy week :)
I just wanted to do a quick journal entry before I have to get going to a meeting.
Right now I have a jumble of feelings I am trying to sort out. Yesterday morning I had some envy going on I tried to write about what caused it and how I felt but I was not doing a very good job of it. I try often to pretend feelings aren't there that are there. And I don't like that I do that. Some areas I get better at not doing that then others.
I chatted with Nick last night for a little bit. I sent him a "scene report" basically for Saturday night. He said he enjoyed it. My talk with him was nice but because my feelings are so jumbled and he is in the mixture of it...I felt that holding back. He felt it too because he mentioned that I was not my normal usual self.
I am trying to decide how, what or if to write about the Dominant I met the last week. I want to but there are some other influences here - with why I am not writing about him yet.
I need to sign off...but I just wrote this post today and thought I would post it here too....
Beware this is MY opinions and how *I* do things....and probably not the norm - but when am I ever normal lol
Slave vs. Submissive (and Bottoms too)
Slave
Basic thing....a slave is owned. I am not a slave because I am not owned. I believe people have slave qualities and some don’t but end up being slaves even if they are not owned. Is there more to it then that? Yes, absolutely. To me…to be a slave it is a mentality as well an emotional bond with the Master.
*To me a slave is owned.
*Rights? No but a right to voice opinion yes.
*Limits? Yes I believe a slave can have hard limits if that is what how the relationship is set up.
*Right to say no? I think that is kind of a semantics thing with me. If I were a slave and said no to my Master, I should know that consequence before saying no. But I also believe it is wording to me. When I was a slave and did not want to do what was asked…I would be on my way to do what my Master said but ask if I could express my opinion and preference on whatever he said to do. And then usually he told me to stop and express and then would go on from there. He would go over my feelings and decided what was best for me and for him. To me a Master can’t make an informed decision without all the info. Okay an example that is out there but only thing I can think of at this moment lol…. lets say the Master tells slave to eat all the white powder off a plate on the counter. Well yesterday that plate had powered sugar but today it has rat poisoning and the Master does not know this but the slave does. The slave should inform her Master of that.
To become a slave to me is a process of enslavement. Showing the slave that nothing is hers anymore…that she is his and all that she is his.
Submissive
Pretty much the same….as a slave to me only process different and level of feelings are different.
*Rights are negotiated - such as if I have a job that takes up lots of my time and get called on meetings and such at a moments notice…as a submissive I feel I have the right to do what is in the best interest of me - so if such as I was suppose to be meeting my Dominant at 6pm and work things come up - I should be polite in calling and telling him. But it is *telling*…not requesting. As a slave I should tell my Master work things came up and it his right to tell me to come anyway or not - knowing my Master will know the consequences if I leave. But it is *his* decision. As a submissive it is *mine.*
*Limits - I believe I have the right to hard limits as I did as a slave.
*Right to say no? No, I don’t feel as a submissive I can say no but that is FOR ME and how I do D/s.
Now I am adding one more category….
Bottom/Play Partners
*Rights? Yes absolutely. I have the right to stop a scene or stop control the Dominant might have over me at anytime. Such as I have had play partners that controlled my orgasms when not with them, but I started having other partners so I discussed with him that was something that was not working out now that I had other partners also.
*Limits? Yes soft and hard and all that is in between
*Right to say no? Hell yeah lol : )
I can come and go and do as please as a bottom.
I have been in all 3 types of relationships....and they have been what worked for me.
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