Message in a Bottle

This weekend has been a whirlwind....

Work, friends with lives turned upside down, Carpe Diem...and so much more. Today has been nice but I still did some work but all of it was at home and no phone and no answering emails :) So that was nice.

It has been about 3 days since I heard from Sir Nick and I know he is very busy with work but this is the longest he has went without contact. I am getting a little antsy and on edge. I miss him a lot.

There is another thing going on in my life that I have not written about at all. There is a local Dominant that has told me he wants me and basically will do what he has to to make me his. We were suppose to meet for breakfast just to talk this morning but he had something come up and was not able to get a hold of me before hand so I got "stood up." I think the manager wanted to have breakfast with me...he kept looking me up and down. I was dressed showing cleavage and in a short skirt, thigh highs and heels. It always throws me when men are so obvious....never trust it lol

Sir Nick is in my mind always...through everything. I care for Nick a lot.

It was Carpe Diem's 2-year anniversary. It seems so strange.....as times it seems like it has been years and year that Carpe Diem has been around and Moni and I have been friends. And other times it seems like yesterday.

Di has lots going on in her life and I need to be here for her more now then ever. And I want to be....she has been a GREAT friend to me and now it is my turn to do the same for her.

I am still chatting with Sir Rob. He has been very good to me while Sir Nick has been working so hard. He and I have had some very good discussions. I have felt sad at times during them because I think of last year when he just disappeared.....a trust factor I guess. He has asked me about the little girl in me and asked me if I would write about it. I really do not write about that part of myself much.

Thinking about being taken....or compelled. Sir Nick compels me much like Mistress DM does. But at times I want to be taken. Maybe I am....I mean so much of the time I look at things Sir Nick does and feel he has done things purposely to make me react so isn't that in a way being taken or forced to go that direction? Sometimes I feel I guess I want to be taken so then it is okay. So then being submissive is not my choice and not wrong because someone else made the choice for me. So I do not have to take responsibility for it. I have heard that some submissives have wanted that when trying bisexuality for the first time - want it to be an order because then it is their Master's responsibility.

I want to sleep tonight so I am drinking a glass of wine. It is a good wine. It was a gift from a man...to woo me. I think he was probably hoping we opened it that night so that he could take advantage of me lol

My mind is racing. There are soooo many topics I want to write about right now but I can't slow things down to let them come out.....topics....companion slaves, humiliation, love, movies I have been watching lately, music, my spiritual beliefs which I am not sure I can even write about and get out to tell other what they are, pain, extremes and so much more lol

From slave girl: "I have been on quite a pain craving trip again lately.....just since the day after the WTC attack....it's a stress thing. I always seem to crave pain when I am unsettled about something....luckily I have a Master who understand this need so well and knows how to help me with it. I swear the pain is better than any shrink I know of..."

It is the same for me and I have often said that a beating is better then a good therapy session. After a session I am very clear and focused. I feel like a big weight has been taken off my shoulders. I have been craving pain so very much.

Listening to the movie Message in a Bottle. There are 3 letters, in the movie, that were thrown out to sea in a bottles. And all of them are very touching. Love....

good night...

peace,
danae