Thursday, April 25, 2002

a mix

Music: a mix

Topics: an anniversary, Jim’s family and Jim, Nice Girls, Affirmative Action, Spirituality Test, Feng Shui and health, and little update on life

The 23rd was an anniversary for me…- I did not even realize it. The reason I found out is because my ex-mother-in-law. When I was married I felt like my mother-in-law was always on me about something - that I could never do anything right for her son. And then after I left - not at first mind you - at first she was very mad but after a while, she came to realize what a good daughter-in-law I was - and we became friends. When I go back to Kansas I have lunch with her and I have even stayed with her and my ex-father-in-law while there. Anyway I had written her filling her in about my life and she wrote back Wednesday and said something about that it was 4 years ago that I had left for Cleveland on the 23rd. Lately it has felt like that much or longer. It used to feel like it was just yesterday, but not probably for the last year has it felt like that.

She updated me on all the family. It made me miss them a lot - even though I had been the one to ask how they all were doing - and she is very cautious about writing about them - she does not want to hurt me but I told her if I ask to please tell me. So she did. But I guess when I realized it had been my anniversary of leaving Kansas and then reading about the family - I then missed them all a lot. Jim had wrote me last week - he was in the attic and found some of my things and wanted to send them to me but if they were in the attic they were storage things so he knew I might want to send them to my mom‘s. He also sent me a form I need to fill out and get notarized - something actually I don’t want to do because I know once he has that form he is probably going to put the house up on the market. The house he and I bought together.

Kam and I were watching the news and they were doing a gardening piece on it and I was thinking about the house and gardening. It was a fun time with Jim. We would in the spring go and pick out flowers at the nursery, bring them back and plant them together. We would throw dirt at each other, spray each other with the hose and just goof around. After we were done we would sit on our porch on the swing and look out at all our flowers : ) it is a nice memory.

Jane wrote about being a nice girl in her entry. Lots of people say that I am a nice girl. And not that there is anything wrong with it but they usually are taken a back that I am into the extreme things that I am - and that I did the job that I did. I had a Dominant once that told me he liked doing sadistic - nasty things to me because I looked so sweet and innocent - it made the pleasure in being sadistic with me - even greater. I like being a nice girl - I am a nice girl. I am also a lot of other things - an artist, a friend, a daughter, a masochist, a painslut, a slut, and so on : )

While I write, sometimes I break and surf the net - which probably explains why you get so many links. But I like to read; I am moved by things - writings, pictures, and people. So I have to share.

Something I cam across tonight - Affirmative action news…-

SignOnSanDiego.com > News > Education -- UC's minority admissions rise

"For the first time since the University of California tossed out race-based admissions, the percentage of Latino, American Indian and black students admitted exceeds what it was during the last days of affirmative action.… 'On a personal level, I am glad to see it happen. It reinforces my view that black kids can perform as well as anyone else, and you don't need to give them any affirmative action,' [UC Regent Ward Connerly] said."

Another thing I surfed upon -
Beliefnet.com

What's Your Spiritual Type?

You scored 67, on a scale of 0 to 100. Here's how to interpret your score

60 - 69 Old-fashioned Seeker -- Happy with my religion but searching for the right expression of it

What I did not like about the test is the title and what the test was actually testing are 2 different things to me. It says what is your spiritual type but I think it is testing for - how religious are you. Those are 2 very different things to me. I am spiritual but I would not call myself religious. I do not attend church but I am not totally opposed to attending - I attended church very regularly until the last year I was married. I really liked the church Jim and I belonged to in Kansas. The Pastor is a woman and very contemporary in her beliefs. I went to church almost always growing up because I “had to” go because I lived in my parents house and under their rules.

Okay another link - From an article on belief.net talking about the book.... Feng Shui and Health by Nancy Santo Pietro....

"One of the most influential factors governing your health today is the amount of clutter you have amassed in your home (especially the bedroom) and workplace. Even if at first the clutter doesn’t seem to be causing a health problem, over time it tends to have a cumulative effect on the body. It becomes what I call an opportunist interior factor waiting for a particularly stressful time in your life to do its thing and zap a specific area of the body or organ that was rendered vulnerable."

I really need to get better enough to get my house in order. So that it helps me stay healthy and peaceful.

Just a little update on life-

Tonight I fell asleep about 7pm I was so tired. I could not even stay awake for Buffy reruns. lol Anyway, I slept until about 2am. I can’t believe I slept that long. I have not slept that long in a long time. I get usually about 4 hours max of sleep at a time. It was nice to be able to sleep that long. And now I am surfing the net reading all sorts of interesting bloggers. I have become obsessed in reading new and different bloggers then I usually read. But still reading my usuals too. I am listening to a mix of a lot of different music - Dave Matthews Band, Coldplay, Madonna, Nickleback, Remy Zero, Bjork, Jewel, Garbage and a few others. Sounds like a weird mix - it is but it works for me. J

Well, I am going to go pop a video in and see if I can get a few more hours of sleep. . .

A quote I think I am going to add to top of my blogger. . .

"These words I write keep me from total madness." Charles Bukowski


peace,
danae

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